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2-Some people think watching TV and films makes children more creative. Others think that it can actually lower their creativity. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Does watching TV and films really affect children’s creativity? Entertainment programs and films nowadays have become an essential thing in everyday life especially children. They witness the excitation of watching their favorite cartoon through television and live in a bubble of their own. Though, this bubble can be a cause of concern. Some people fear that exposing their children to television programs will affect their creativity as they don’t explore the real world. Moreover, the lack of imagination is another crucial factor as the ideas are presented in front of them on TV. However, watching all these programs won't necessarily lower their creativity level as they’re being exposed to different forms of art and educational channels like cooking, theatre and problem-solving. Correspondingly, this will affect the child development in a positive way and improve their problem-solving ability. Also, it can help them discover a talent and learn how to perfect it. To begin with, not all TV programs are for absurd purposes, there are educational and creative ones that grab the child's attention and give them the ability to use their brain. For instance, there is a TV show called “wonder pets”. This show aims to help children increase their teamwork skills as well as think of effective ways to solve problems by displaying it in the form of 3 pets who work together to save their friends. This will give them the ability to increase their problem solving technique and think of other ways to solve problems. Moreover, there are shows and movies that teach children certain morals that will affect their development as well as their minds and attitude. For illustrations, Always tell the truth and never lie, have courage and take risks, keep your promises and do not cheat. These all are great examples that TV isn’t as bad as some might think and it actually helps in developing them rather than negatively affecting them. Moreover, TV programs can also help in discovering new talents like drawing, cooking, singing or acting. There are programs that focus on developing certain skills in children. Some of these programs are the art programs that can slowly help children improve their art skills. This will lead them to think in a creative way and imagine a scene in their head and soon they can bring it to life on a piece of paper. Additionally, it can also advance their singing or acting abilities. Watching movies and relating to a certain character can make them feel the need to recreate their acting, this will improve their skills while giving them the ability to be creative and imagine beyond the scene and perform it their own way. On the other hand, some people think that the best way to improve their children's creativity is by completely preventing children from watching any sort of TVs shows or movies whatsoever. This way children are able to be present outside their homes and exposed to the real world around them. Also they can now develop strong imagination and think creatively as children who watch TV excessively won’t be able to stimulate their minds or come up with fresh minds. Moreover, this can lead to lack of focus in children and poor performance in the classroom. Thus, the child will less likely participate in creative and mental activities. For instance, there is evidence shown that most children who spend excessive amounts of time on TV will be more likely to develop (ADHD) that makes them lack the ability to focus and learn during classes. In conclusion, TV is a needed piece of technology in every household. As it can be harmful to our children it also plays an important role in building their creativity in a variety of ways. We can try and protect our children from the harm caused by it. By making sure they’re watching quality shows, limiting time spent in front of TV and trying to watch these programs to make sure they’re as informative as possible and not inappropriate.
Does watching TV and films
really
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affect
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
creativity? Entertainment
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
and films nowadays have become an essential thing in everyday life
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. They witness the excitation of watching their favorite cartoon through television and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a bubble of their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
.
“Though” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Though
, this bubble can be a cause of concern.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
fear that exposing their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
to television
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affect
their creativity as they don’t explore the real world.
Moreover
, the lack of imagination is another crucial factor as the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
are presented
in front of them on TV.
However
, watching all these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
won't
necessarily
lower their creativity level as they’re
being exposed
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
forms of art and educational channels like cooking,
Possible spelling mistake. ‘theatre’ is British English.
theatre
and problem-solving.
Correspondingly
, this will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affect
the child development in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their problem-solving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
.
Also
, it can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
them discover a talent and learn how to perfect it.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, not all TV
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
are for absurd purposes, there are educational and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
creative
ones that grab the child's attention and give them the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
their brain.
For instance
, there is a TV
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
called “wonder pets”. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
show
aims to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
increase their teamwork
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
of effective
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to solve problems by displaying it in the form of 3 pets who work together to save their friends. This will give them the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
to increase their
This noun or verb “problem-solving” is spelled with a hyphen.
problem solving
technique and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
of other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to solve problems.
Moreover
, there are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shows
and movies that teach
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
certain morals that will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
affect
their development
as well
as their minds and attitude. For illustrations, Always
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tell
the truth and never lie, have courage and take
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
your promises and do not cheat. These all are great examples that TV isn’t as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
might
Use a comma before ‘and’ if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
think and
it actually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
helps
in developing them
rather
than
negatively
affecting them.

Moreover
, TV
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
can
also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
in discovering new talents like drawing, cooking, singing or acting. There are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
that focus on developing certain
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
are the art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
that can
slowly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
help
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their art
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
. This will lead them to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
creative
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
and imagine a scene in their head and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
soon
they can bring it to life on a piece of paper.
Additionally
, it can
also
advance their singing or acting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
abilities
. Watching movies and relating to a certain character can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them feel the need to recreate their acting, this will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
skills
while giving them the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
to be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
creative
and imagine beyond the scene and perform it their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
way.

On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
that the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
improve
their children's creativity is by completely preventing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
from watching any sort of TVs
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shows
or movies whatsoever. This
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
are able to be present outside their homes and exposed to the real world around them.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
develop strong imagination and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
think
creatively
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
TV
excessively
won’t be able to stimulate their minds or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
up with fresh minds.
Moreover
, this can lead to lack of
This phrase is redundant. Consider using “focus”.
focus in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
and poor performance in the classroom.
Thus
, the child will less likely participate in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
creative
and mental activities.
For instance
, there is evidence shown that most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who spend excessive amounts of time on TV will be more likely to develop (ADHD) that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
them lack the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ability
to focus and learn during classes.

In conclusion
, TV is a needed piece of technology in every household.
“As” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
As
it can be harmful to our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
it
also
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in building their creativity in a variety of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
. We can try and protect our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
from the harm caused by it. By making sure they’re watching quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
shows
, limiting time spent in front of TV and trying to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
programs
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
sure they’re as informative as possible and not inappropriate.
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IELTS essay 2-Some people think watching TV and films makes children more creative. Others think that it can actually lower their creativity.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
666 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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