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1. People argue that students need to learn on what they need while the others think some important subjects such as science and technology should be studied. In what extent do you agree?

1. People argue that students need to learn on what they need while the others think some important subjects such as science and technology should be studied. In what extent do you agree? Gw7bg
In a period of years, it is undeniable that university education has played a dispensable role in every society that brings a variety of opportunities to our students. However, it is often argued that university students should learn depending on their needs, whilst others defend the idea that relevant subjects similar to science and technology must be studied. In this essay, both views will be equally discussed, and I am into the first idea because of many reasons. In the beginning, we are going to discuss some of the main benefits of freedom in choosing subjects by university students. Selecting proper subjects is actually a beneficial point to have full understanding in their necessary majors. For instance, if a student is truly into mechanical engineering, they should have chosen Math, Physics, and some kinds of relevant mechanical stuff. Additionally, it would be so knowledgeable focusing on relevant subjects only and developing internal skills for their future careers. However, a significant revolution in our society requires many types of subjects relating to science and technology. Learning those categories would do wonders for the contribution and doing honor to our country. In fact, our GDP has been increasing fast and gradually taking responsibility for those tech-like facilities, and advanced subjects will be manipulated widely in such situations. I find myself interested in the first opinion because learning unnecessary subjects can be a massive time-sucker, especially university students disliking and assuming those kinds of science ones tedious, which can lead to bad overall average marks.
In a period of years, it is undeniable that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
education has played a dispensable role in every society that brings a variety of opportunities to our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
However
, it is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
argued that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
should learn depending on their needs, whilst others defend the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that relevant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
similar to science and technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
be studied
. In this essay, both views will be
equally
discussed, and I am into the
first
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons.

In the beginning, we are going to discuss
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
main benefits of freedom in choosing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
. Selecting proper
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
is actually a beneficial point to have full understanding in their necessary majors.
For instance
, if a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student
is
truly
into mechanical engineering, they should have chosen Math, Physics, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
kinds of relevant mechanical stuff.
Additionally
, it would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
knowledgeable focusing on relevant
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
and developing internal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
for their future careers.

However
, a significant revolution in our society requires
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
types of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
relating to science and technology. Learning those categories would do wonders for the contribution and doing honor to our country. In fact, our GDP has been increasing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
and
gradually
taking responsibility for those tech-like facilities, and advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
will
be manipulated
widely
in such situations.

I find myself interested in the
first
opinion
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
learning unnecessary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
subjects
can be a massive time-sucker,
especially
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
university
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
disliking and assuming those kinds of science ones tedious, which can lead to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
overall
average marks.
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IELTS essay 1. People argue that students need to learn on what they need while the others think some important subjects such as science and technology should be studied. In what extent do you agree?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
252 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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  • 1. People argue that students need to learn on what they need while the others think some important subjects such as science and technology should be studied. In what extent do you agree?