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y wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. Discuss both these views and give

y wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. Discuss both these views and give 8GElB
The diagram illustrates cycle of silkworm and the stages in the production of silk clothes In general, the process transformated cocoon to silk clothes The first there is cocoon experience 16 days become month. The month which lying on the leaf and lay eggs. During 10 days, it grow silkworm larva live on mulbery leaf. After, 4-6 weeks, larva was mature which producted silk thead, or called cocoon Cocoon is boil by water in the pot, unwind and roll silk about long 300-900m. Thereby cocoon weave removed silk. Take it dye with colors. Final they can product silk cloth
The diagram illustrates cycle of silkworm and the stages in the production of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
silk
clothes

In general
, the process
Possible spelling mistake found.
transformated
cocoon to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
silk
clothes

The
first
there is cocoon experience 16 days become month.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
month which lying on the leaf and lay eggs. During 10 days, it
Did you mean "grows"?
grow
silkworm larva
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
on
Possible spelling mistake found.
mulbery
leaf. After, 4-6 weeks, larva was mature which
Possible spelling mistake found.
producted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
silk
Possible spelling mistake found.
thead
, or called cocoon

Cocoon is boil by water in the pot, unwind and roll
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
silk
about long 300
Insert a space between the numerical value and the unit symbol "-900 m"
-900m
. Thereby cocoon weave removed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
silk
. Take it dye with colors. Final they
The word 'product' is a noun or an adjective. A verb or adverb is missing or misspelled here, or maybe a comma is missing.
can product
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
silk
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
cloth
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IELTS academic y wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. Discuss both these views and give

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
98 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • y wrong, while others consider it as valuable work experience, important for learning and taking responsibility. Discuss both these views and give