Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

workforce in a city, finance, technology and retail

workforce in a city, finance, technology and retail Nmryq
The graph illustrates the amount of the workforce that are employed in four industries (in percent) in a city in the period of 30 years. (from 1980 to 2010) Overall, workforce of the parts finance, technology and retail had a increase trend while for finance workforce had seen a reduce trend. In 1980 to 1990, the workforce employed in parts of finance, technology and retail had a gradually increase from about 3. 7 to 6. 1. In 1990 to 2000 experienced a slowly incline from approximately from approximately 6. 7 to 6. 5 % and 3% to 5 %. And the part of finance had sharply raise from about 7% to 14%. In 2000 to 2010, the part of retail had constantly trend in 5%, the part of technology saw moderately increase from 6% to 10% and finance had a slowly incline from 14% to 15%. For the part of manufacturing, the trend had moderately decrease from approximately 25% to 7. 5%.
The graph illustrates the amount of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workforce
that
are employed
in four industries (in percent) in a city in the period of 30 years. (from 1980 to 2010)

Overall
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workforce
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parts
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
finance
, technology and retail had
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
increase trend while for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
finance
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workforce
had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
trend.

In 1980 to 1990, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workforce
employed in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parts
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
finance
, technology and retail had a
You used an adverb ('gradually') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('increase') instead of another adjective.
gradually increase
from about 3. 7 to 6. 1. In 1990 to 2000 experienced a
You used an adverb ('slowly') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('incline') instead of another adjective.
slowly incline
This phrase is duplicated. You should probably leave only "from approximately".
from approximately from approximately
6. 7 to 6. 5 % and 3% to 5 %. And the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
finance
had
sharply
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "raised".
raise
from about 7% to 14%. In 2000 to 2010, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
of retail had
constantly
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "trended".
trend
in 5%, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
of technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
moderately
increase from 6% to 10% and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
finance
had a
You used an adverb ('slowly') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('incline') instead of another adjective.
slowly incline
from 14% to 15%. For the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
part
of manufacturing, the trend had
moderately
Possible agreement error -- use past participle here: "decreased".
decrease
from approximately 25% to 7. 5%.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS academic workforce in a city, finance, technology and retail

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
162 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts