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Unforgettable and memorable house in my life

Unforgettable and memorable house in my life joq5M
Despite the sun beams it's lights overhead the house it looks so dull. The walls look like a senile man, doors and windows without locking it seems to say you some important things. This is a valued house for me. My childhood held in that house. I never couldn't forget that times we amazingly played games with our grandparents. There was colorful flowers, charming garden with all fruits, lively yard full of children and prosperous family members. Every evening in summer days all of us; grandsons, granddaughters, parents and relatives were sitting around enormous table cloth, were chatting, were telling jokes, who is laughing loudly, who is waiting tasty, delicious meal as chuchvara or Manti. Also we had a cattle; black and white cows, horrible fighter bulls, fluffy chickens, a shaggy dog and flannel cat. Sometimes we went swimming in the small brooklet with noisy sounds which made our neighbors nervous. I desire will that days comes again. I entirely miss that days.
Despite the sun beams
it's
lights overhead the
house
it looks
so
dull. The walls look like a senile
man
, doors and windows without locking it seems to say you
some
important
things. This is a valued
house
for me. My childhood held in that
house
. I never couldn't forget that times we
amazingly
played games with our grandparents.
There was colorful flowers
, charming garden with all fruits, lively yard full of children and prosperous family members. Every evening in summer days all of us; grandsons, granddaughters, parents and relatives were sitting around enormous table cloth, were chatting, were telling jokes, who is laughing
loudly
, who is waiting tasty, delicious meal as
chuchvara
or
Manti
.
Also
we had
a cattle
; black and white cows, horrible fighter bulls, fluffy chickens, a shaggy dog and flannel cat.
Sometimes
we went swimming in the
small
brooklet with noisy sounds which made our neighbors nervous. I desire will that days
comes
again. I
entirely
miss that days.
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IELTS academic Unforgettable and memorable house in my life

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
163 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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