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two maps show sunny island before and after commercialisation, Summarise the information by selectinf the main features and making comparisons where relevant

two maps show sunny island before and after commercialisation, 8x88P
The given map reveals the dramatic changes in a small island that had been developed to add a number of facilities, especially for the visiting tourists Overall, with the construction of different types of facilities, the island has been transformed into a tourist attraction where people can stay, eat, play and easily get around. The island is about 250 meters long. Before development started, it only had a beach along its western coast and some stands of palms near its eastern and western ends. These natural features remain unchanged after development However, two accommodation areas with footpaths have been built in the center and west of the island respectively. The footpaths in the western accommodation area have been extended westward to the beach where people can now go swimming Between the two accommodation areas is reception, which is surrounded by a vehicle track. This track connects with the footpaths west of it, and extends northward to a new restaurant and southward to a new pier. The eastern part of the island remains same
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
map reveals the dramatic
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
island
that had
been developed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
a number of facilities,
especially
for the visiting tourists

Overall
, with the construction of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
types of facilities, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
island
has
been transformed
into a tourist attraction where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can stay, eat, play and
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
around.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
island
is about 250 meters long.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
development
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
had a beach along its western coast and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
stands of palms near its eastern and western ends. These natural features remain unchanged after development
However
, two accommodation areas with footpaths have
been built
in the center and west of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
island
respectively
. The footpaths in the western accommodation area have
been extended
westward to the beach where
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
go swimming Between the two accommodation areas is reception, which
is surrounded
by a vehicle
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
. This
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
connects with the footpaths west of it, and extends northward to a new restaurant and southward to a new pier. The eastern part of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
island
remains
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
same
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IELTS academic two maps show sunny island before and after commercialisation,

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
172 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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