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tourist attraction in edinburgh

tourist attraction in edinburgh 86LAP
It is clear from the line graph show that during the 1980s and 1995s, there was a significant increase in visitors to the castle from about 23% to nearly 45% and the proportion dropped gradually to 30% in 2010. The trend for the aquarium was similar to the castle. Visitors rose dramatically from 20% to around 35% between 1980 and 1985 and then gradually decreased to under 10% over the next twenty-five years. On the other hand, the proportion of tourists who visited the festival fluctuated slightly but in general, remained stable at about 25% from 1980 to 2010. Visitors to the zoo also fluctuated between 1980 and 2000 and then rose sharply from 10% to 20% from 2000 to 2010.
It is
clear
from the line graph
show
that during the 1980s and 1995s, there was a significant increase in visitors to the castle from about 23% to
nearly
45% and the proportion dropped
gradually
to 30% in 2010. The trend for the aquarium was similar to the castle. Visitors rose
dramatically
from 20% to around 35% between 1980 and 1985 and then
gradually
decreased to under 10% over the
next
twenty-five years.
On the other hand
, the proportion of tourists who visited the festival fluctuated
slightly
but
in general
, remained stable at about 25% from 1980 to 2010. Visitors to the zoo
also
fluctuated between 1980 and 2000 and then rose
sharply
from 10% to 20% from 2000 to 2010.
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IELTS academic tourist attraction in edinburgh

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
121 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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