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total value and sources of fish to the US

total value and sources of fish to the US 6N1qB
Given is the charts provided the US’s fish imported value, as well as differences between three fish sources supplied to the US in 1988, 1992, and 2000. It is readily apparent that the total imported money was an upside trend, whereas China and other countries played a more integral part in sources of fish provided to the US. Looking more specifically, from 6. 57 billion dollars in 1988, four years later experienced a moderate increase in the imported value to 8. 52 billion in 1992. From 1992 to 2000, the ascend was at the same speed as the first four years, rising by approximately 2 billion dollars. To be more detailed, 10. 72 billion was recorded in 2000 as the peak of this value over three years given. Moving on to pie charts, in 1998, Canada constituted the highest ratio of the fish to the US, at 60%, which is followed by others with 27%, while China was half figures of others. However, throughout the three years given, Canada’s imported fish was the only to undergo a descend, first dropping by half in 1992 and then decreasing considerable to 28% in 2000. Conversely, the fish of China imported to the US rose by 7% in 1992, before then surging to 30% in 2000, surpassing Canada to the second position. Finally, there was a twofold increase in the number of others’ imported fish in 1992, coming out first at nearly a half, before the figures then dropped gently to 42% in the end.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Given
is the charts provided the US’s fish
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imported
value,
as well
as differences between three fish sources supplied to the US in 1988, 1992, and 2000. It is
readily
apparent that the total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imported
money was an upside trend, whereas China and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
countries played a more integral part in sources of fish provided to the US.

Looking more
specifically
, from 6. 57
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
dollars in 1988, four years later experienced a moderate increase in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imported
value to 8. 52
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
in 1992. From 1992 to 2000,
After 'the', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'ascend' is correct. If 'ascend' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
the ascend
was at the same speed as the
first
four years, rising by approximately 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
dollars. To be more detailed, 10. 72
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
billion
was recorded
in 2000 as the peak of this value over three years
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
.

Moving on to pie charts, in 1998, Canada constituted the highest ratio of the fish to the US, at 60%, which
is followed
by others with 27%, while China was half figures of others.
However
, throughout the three years
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
, Canada’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imported
fish was the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to undergo
After 'a', do not use a verb. Make sure that the spelling of 'descend' is correct. If 'descend' is the first word in a compound adjective, use a hyphen between the two words. Note: This error message can occur if you use a verb as a noun, and the word is not a noun in standard English.
a descend
,
first
dropping by half in 1992 and then decreasing considerable to 28% in 2000.
Conversely
, the fish of China
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imported
to the US rose by 7% in 1992,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
then surging to 30% in 2000, surpassing Canada to the second position.
Finally
, there was a twofold increase in the number of others’
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
imported
fish in 1992, coming out
first
at
nearly
a half,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
the figures then dropped
gently
to 42% in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
.
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IELTS academic total value and sources of fish to the US

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
252 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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