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The two maps show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons there relevant

The two maps show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. BJYG9
The maps provide information about the road connections to the City Hospital and the changes made during the year 2007 and 2010. Overall map, illustrates that major changes includes the construction of two roundabouts along the Hospital road. in addition to this, the parking facilities of staff and public were separated according to the map of 2010. The ring road that only connected the parking area for staff and public in the map of 2007 was diverted to a different route leading to the public car park.
The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
maps
provide information about the road connections to the City Hospital and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
made during the year 2007 and 2010.
Overall
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
map
, illustrates that major
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
includes the construction of two roundabouts along the Hospital road.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
addition to this, the parking facilities of staff and public
were separated
according to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
map
of 2010. The ring road that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
connected the parking area for staff and public in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
map
of 2007
was diverted
to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
route leading to the public car park.

IELTS academic The two maps show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
87 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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