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The two maps show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting the main features and make comparisons there relevant

The two maps show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010. 0AlWn
The maps provide information about the road connections to the City Hospital and the changes made during the year 2007 and 2010. Overall map, illustrates that major changes includes the construction of two roundabouts along the Hospital road. in addition to this, the parking facilities of staff and public were separated according to the map of 2010. The ring road that only connected the parking area for staff and public in the map of 2007 was diverted to a different route leading to the public car park. The hospital road that connected ring road and city road was built with two roundabout towards the north and south of the hospital road as per the map of 2010. The north and south roundabouts connected the ring road and the south roads respectively. The earlier car park represented in the map was converted to car parks exclusively for staff during 2010. According to the city hospital map pf 2007, the bus stops present on the either side of the hospital road was moved to the west of the hospital road and a bus station was built. The station was connected to both the roundabout's as depicted in the 2010 city hospital map. However, one entry leading to the car park area had remained unchanged both in the year 2007 and in 2010.
The
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maps
provide information about the
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road
connections to the City
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Hospital
and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
made during the year 2007 and 2010.
Overall
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map
, illustrates that major
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
includes the construction of two roundabouts along the
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Hospital
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road
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
addition to this, the parking facilities of staff and public
were separated
according to the
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map
of 2010. The ring
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road
that
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only
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connected
the parking area for staff and public in the
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map
of 2007
was diverted
to a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
route leading to the public
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car
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park
. The
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hospital
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road
that
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connected
ring
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road
and city
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road
was built
with two roundabout towards the north and south of the
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hospital
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road
as per the
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map
of 2010.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
north and south roundabouts
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connected
the ring
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road
and the south
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roads
respectively
.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
earlier
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car
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park
represented in the
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map
was converted
to
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car
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parks
exclusively for staff during 2010. According to the city
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hospital
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map
pf 2007, the bus
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stops
present on the either side of the
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hospital
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road
was
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moved
to the west of the
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hospital
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road
and a bus station
was built
. The station was
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connected
to both the roundabout's as depicted in the 2010 city
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hospital
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
map
.
However
, one entry leading to the
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car
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
area had remained unchanged both in the year 2007 and in 2010.
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IELTS academic The two maps show road access to a city hospital in 2007 and in 2010.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
220 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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