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The two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities. v.3

The two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities. v. 3
The maps depict an island before and after some renovation works for tourists and compares the changed on the island for the constructions. Generally speaking, many new facilities have been constructed for tourists, including accommodations, restaurant, swimming facilities etc. and those have been built without affecting the natural resources that much. Before the facilities were constructed, there was only trees and beach on the island and most of the places were empty. In this island, many new tourists’ facilities have been made including accommodation facilities, restaurant, reception centre, pier for boating, swimming facility on the beach and so on. Interestingly plants and trees were not cut down to build these constructions and most of the constructions were made near the beach. Besides, footpaths and roads for commuting have been built to facilitate the tourists. The footpaths were made to walk between the residing places and the beach while the motor tracks were created to visit the restaurant, reception area, and pier for boating. In summary, the construction was mainly made to facilitate the tourists' stay, visit and amusement and for that, no plants or trees were cut.
The maps depict an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
island
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
and after
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
renovation works for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
and compares the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
on the
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island
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
constructions
.
Generally
speaking,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
new facilities have
been constructed
for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
, including accommodations, restaurant, swimming facilities etc. and those have
been built
without affecting the natural resources that much.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
the facilities
were constructed
, there was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
trees and beach on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
island
and most of the places were empty. In this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
island
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists’
facilities have
been made
including accommodation facilities, restaurant, reception
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
, pier for boating, swimming facility on the beach and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Interestingly
plants and trees were not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
down to build these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
constructions
and most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
constructions
were made
near the beach.

Besides
, footpaths and roads for commuting have
been built
to facilitate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
tourists
. The footpaths
were made
to walk between the residing places and the beach while the motor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
were created
to visit the restaurant, reception area, and pier for boating.

In summary, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
construction
was
mainly
made to facilitate the tourists' stay, visit and amusement and for that, no plants or trees were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
cut
.
3Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
12Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS academic The two maps below show an island, before and after the construction of some tourist facilities. v. 3

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
187 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
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