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The tabular illustration reveals the comparison amongst traveller who gave preference to bus for visiting destination in United Kingdom from2009to 2011.

The tabular illustration reveals the comparison amongst traveller who gave preference to bus for visiting destination in United Kingdom from2009to 2011. BYewm
The tabular illustration reveals the comparison amongst traveller who gave preference to bus for visiting destination in United Kingdom from2009to 2011. In general, bus had been preferred by maximum percentage of people to shop things as compared to other purposes. To specify, in2009, 65percent traveller used bus for shopping followed by 2010, 2011 with 56, 51percent respectively. Whereas, for reaching on study destination, similarly was observed in percentage of people in 2010, 2011. while only 4percent individuals used bus in 2009. However, the minimum proportion of people traveled by bus comprisesd for 3to go on work Places in give three years. Strolling forth, there was small difference was noticed among people who visited friends and percentage of day tour with 12 in 2009, 2010. Bus had been preferred by 19 percent people for visiting friends whereas 12percent day tour was seen in 2010. The proportion of people was double in 2011who visited friends than day tour. Sukhjeet kaur
The tabular illustration reveals the comparison amongst
Possible spelling mistake found.
traveller
who gave preference to bus for visiting destination
A determiner is probably missing here: "in the United Kingdom".
in United Kingdom
from2009to 2011.

In general
, bus had
been preferred
by maximum percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to shop things as compared to other purposes.

To specify, in2009,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
65percent
Possible spelling mistake found.
traveller
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
bus for shopping followed by 2010, 2011 with 56,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
51percent
respectively
. Whereas, for reaching on study destination,
similarly
was observed
in percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
in 2010, 2011.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
while
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
4percent
individuals
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
bus in 2009.
However
, the minimum proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
traveled by bus
Possible spelling mistake found.
comprisesd
for 3to go on work Places in give three years.

Strolling forth, there was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
difference
was noticed
Do not mix variants of the same word ('among' and 'amongst') within a single text.
among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who visited friends and percentage of day tour with 12 in 2009, 2010. Bus had
been preferred
by 19
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
for visiting friends whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
12percent
day tour was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in 2010. The proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
was double in 2011who visited friends than day tour.

Possible spelling mistake found.
Sukhjeet
Possible spelling mistake found.
kaur
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IELTS academic The tabular illustration reveals the comparison amongst traveller who gave preference to bus for visiting destination in United Kingdom from2009to 2011.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
157 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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