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The table shows the number of visitors in a museum before and after refurbishment whereas the pie charts show their satisfaction levels analyzed from a survey. Summarize and make relevant comparisons.

The table shows the number of visitors in a museum before and after refurbishment whereas the pie charts show their satisfaction levels analyzed from a survey. Summarize and make relevant comparisons. rYwKL
The tabular data and the pie charts illustrate the total amount of people who visited the Ashdown museum before and after refurbishment and their level of satisfaction. At a first glance, it can be observed that there is a rise in the number of visitors and the change in satisfaction levels is extremely positive. The total number of visitors have increased from 74, 000 before refurbishment to 92, 000 after refurbishment. When we compare the satisfaction surveys, we can see that the proportions of both satisfied and very satisfied visitors have increased from 15% to 35% and from 30% to 40% respectively. There has been a simultaneous decrease in percentage of visitors dissatisfied and very dissatisfied from 40% to to 15% and from 10% to 5% respectively. However, the survey remains incomplete to a certain extent because 5% of the total visitors never responded in both the years. We can conclude that the refurbishment process has had a wonderful influence on the experience and the satisfaction obtained by the tourists. It won't be an overstatement to say that the process has yielded successful results for the museum.
The tabular data and the pie charts illustrate the total amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who visited the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Ashdown
museum
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
and after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refurbishment
and their level of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
. At a
first
glance, it can
be observed
that there is a rise in the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
and the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
levels is
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
.

The total number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
have increased from 74, 000
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refurbishment
to 92, 000 after
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refurbishment
. When we compare the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
surveys, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the proportions of both satisfied and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
satisfied
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
have increased from 15% to 35% and from 30% to 40%
respectively
. There has been a simultaneous decrease in percentage of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
dissatisfied and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
dissatisfied from 40%
Possible typo: you repeated a word
to to
15% and from 10% to 5%
respectively
.
However
, the survey remains incomplete to a certain extent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
5% of the total
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
never responded in both the years.

We can conclude that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
refurbishment
process has had a wonderful influence on the experience and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
satisfaction
obtained by the tourists. It won't be an overstatement to say that the process has yielded successful results for the museum.
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IELTS academic The table shows the number of visitors in a museum before and after refurbishment whereas the pie charts show their satisfaction levels analyzed from a survey. Summarize and make relevant comparisons.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
187 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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