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The table compares the percentage of people using different functions of their Mobile phone between 2006 and 2010.

The table compares the percentage of people using different functions of their Mobile phone between 2006 and 2010. El0KM
This table highlights percentages of Mobile phone owners Utilizing various Mobile phone functions between 2006 and 2010. What stands out from the table is that there exist 7 functions of Mobile phone and they were utilized with different rates. Firstly, the most using function was make calls with total 100% in 2006 and 2008. And it was the most percent in 2010 too. But also, Its rate was 99%. And this rate was 20% more than sending and receiving text messeges in 2010. Besides, this number was 3% more than taking photos whereas searching the Internet was 3 % less than taking photos. Furthermore, play games was 41% in 2010. And this figure was 15% more than playing music while playing music was 9% less than recording video. Secondly, Recording video and searching video were not Utilizing by phone owners in 2006. Hovewer both of them were used with different rates with 41% and 9%. In addition, searching Internet rate was only 1 % less than play games in 2008.
This table highlights percentages of Mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
owners Utilizing various Mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
functions between 2006 and 2010. What stands out from the table is that there exist 7 functions of Mobile
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
phone and
they
were utilized
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
.
Firstly
, the most using function was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
calls with total 100% in 2006 and 2008. And it was the most percent in 2010 too.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
also
, Its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
was 99%. And this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
was 20% more than sending and receiving text
Possible spelling mistake found.
messeges
in 2010.
Besides
, this number was 3% more than taking photos whereas searching the Internet was 3 % less than taking photos.
Furthermore
, play games was 41% in 2010. And this figure was 15% more than playing music while playing music was 9% less than recording video.
Secondly
, Recording video and searching video were not Utilizing by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
owners in 2006.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Hovewer
both of them were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rates
with 41% and 9%.
In addition
, searching Internet
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rate
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
1 % less than play games in 2008.
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IELTS academic The table compares the percentage of people using different functions of their Mobile phone between 2006 and 2010.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
170 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
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Lexical Resource: 5.0
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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    Present relevant ideas
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