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The table below gives information about favourite pastimes in different countries.https://www-ielts--mentor-com.cdn.ampproject.org/ii/w820/s/www.ielts-mentor.com/images/writingsamples/ielts-graph-84-favorite pastimes in different countries.

The table below gives information about favourite pastimes in different countries. https: //www-ielts--mentor-com. cdn. ampproject. org/ii/w820/s/www. ielts-mentor. com/images/writingsamples/ielts-graph-84-favorite pastimes in different countries. VreQA
The given tab chart gives the detail regarding the pastimes in distinct nations from 30-50 years old people. It ie observed that, in leisure time most of the individuals watching television in canada, Korea and USA. In Korea and China many multitudes prefer reading in free time. Masses spend pastime for sports is highest in Korea and least in England and Australia. Moreover, in free time people prefer to do hobbies with highest figure of 52 in USA and least figure noticed in Japan and in Canada the masses cannot listen music in free time. In Australia also many people can choose sleep in pastime as comparison to other countries and in Canada, few persons are interested for beach in free time. To conclude, most of the people prefer television and reading in free time and least prefer for music in Canada.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
tab chart gives the detail regarding the pastimes in distinct nations from 30-50 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

It
Possible spelling mistake found.
ie
observed that, in leisure
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
most of the individuals watching television in
Possible spelling mistake found.
canada
, Korea and USA. In Korea and China
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
multitudes
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
reading in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. Masses spend pastime for sports is highest in Korea and least in England and Australia.
Moreover
, in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
to do hobbies with
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
figure of 52
A determiner is probably missing here: "in the USA".
in USA
and least figure noticed in Japan and in Canada the masses cannot listen music in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. In Australia
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can choose sleep in pastime as comparison to other countries and in Canada, few persons
are interested
for beach in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
To conclude
, most of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
television and reading in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and least
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
prefer
for music in Canada.
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IELTS academic The table below gives information about favourite pastimes in different countries. https: //www-ielts--mentor-com. cdn. ampproject. org/ii/w820/s/www. ielts-mentor. com/images/writingsamples/ielts-graph-84-favorite pastimes in different countries.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
142 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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