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the proportion of GDP contribution from three different sectors: agriculture, industry and services to India.

the proportion of GDP contribution from three different sectors: agriculture, industry and services to India. eAorx
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of GDP contribution from three different sectors: agriculture, industry and services to India. In 1960, around 63% of India's GDP was constituted by agricultural contribution, in comparison with about 17% and about 15% was made up by services and by industry contribution respectively. By the end of the period, the contribution of agriculture fell dramatically by about 48%. In 1980, the contribution of industry to India's GDP climbed steadily of roughly 9%, and then witnessed a stability at 24%. Regarding the figure for services contribution continued to rise and reach the peak of approximately 63%.
The bar chart illustrates the proportion of GDP
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contribution
from three
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different
sectors: agriculture, industry and services to India.

In 1960, around 63% of India's GDP
was constituted
by agricultural
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contribution
,
in comparison
with about 17% and about 15%
was made
up by services and by industry
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contribution
respectively
. By the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contribution
of agriculture fell
dramatically
by about 48%.

In 1980, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contribution
of industry to India's GDP climbed
steadily
of roughly 9%, and then witnessed a stability at 24%. Regarding the figure for services
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
contribution
continued to rise and reach the peak of approximately 63%.

IELTS academic the proportion of GDP contribution from three different sectors: agriculture, industry and services to India.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
101 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
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Lexical Resource: 6.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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Task Achievement: 7.0
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