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The process show manufacturing of sugar.

The process show manufacturing of sugar. wOqGE
The diagram detailed above delineates how sugar and manufactured from sugar cane. Looking from overall perspective, it is readily apparent that this process a series of stages which initially consist of harvesting, crushing, purification, drying and cooling finally. The manufacturing process commences when the sugar canes is ready for harvesting after growing for about one or one and half year. Furthermore, prepared sugarcane are cut skillfully by either combine machine or by hand, thereafter; collected sugarcane then are transported for crushing. Coming to next step, a specific machine turns sugarcane into juice and further, it goes through a process of purification. In the following leg, limestone filter is used for purifying juice in order to remove residues from it. However, a huge vessel called evaporator containing sugarcane'juice is heated for making syrup. Hereinafter, sorting is done to separate sugar crystals from syrup. Moreover, after being cooled in a container, the dried sugar is sent for packaging to sell.
The diagram detailed above delineates how
sugar
and manufactured from
sugar
cane.

Looking from
overall
perspective, it is
readily
apparent that this process a series of stages which
initially
consist of harvesting, crushing, purification, drying and cooling
finally
.

The manufacturing process commences when the
sugar
canes is ready for harvesting after growing for about one or one and half year.
Furthermore
, prepared sugarcane are
cut
skillfully
by either combine machine or by hand, thereafter; collected sugarcane then
are transported
for crushing. Coming to
next
step, a specific machine turns sugarcane into juice and
further
, it goes through a process of purification.

In the following leg, limestone filter is
used
for purifying juice in order to remove residues from it.
However
, a huge vessel called evaporator containing sugarcane'juice
is heated
for making syrup. Hereinafter, sorting
is done
to separate
sugar
crystals from syrup.
Moreover
, after
being cooled
in a container, the dried
sugar
is
sent
for packaging to sell.
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IELTS academic The process show manufacturing of sugar.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
158 words
7.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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