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The process below shows one of the way to make clay pots

The process below shows one of the way to make clay pots PVknw
The given process illustrates how ceramic pots are produced. Overall, the diagram consists of 10 main steps in total, beginning with searching raw materials and ending when finished pots are on the market. To commence with, raw materials are collected and sent to the factories making pots. After that, all of them are put into a crushing machine to be transferred into small pieces. The following stage involved the mixing step, which means those miniature fragments are combined with water. Once they are mixed, they will be moved to the moulds to create the shape of the pots through a pipe. After 4 to 6 hours of being dried, the original raw materials now are assembled clay pots. During the following step, clay pots are put into an oven with 1000 degree celsius. Afterwards, they are coloured to look more gorgeous. Subsequently, they have to go through a firing process to maintain the colour. The process ends when complete clay pots are bought and sought by human beings.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
process illustrates how ceramic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pots
are produced
.

Overall
, the diagram consists of 10 main steps in total, beginning with searching raw materials and ending when finished
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pots
are on the market.

To commence with, raw materials
are collected
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sent
to the factories making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pots
. After that, all of them
are put
into a crushing machine to
be transferred
into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
pieces. The following stage involved the mixing step, which means those miniature fragments
are combined
with water. Once they
are mixed
, they will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to the
Possible spelling mistake. 'moulds' is British English.
moulds
to create the shape of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pots
through a pipe. After 4 to 6 hours of
being dried
, the original raw materials
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
are assembled
clay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pots
. During the following step, clay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pots
are put
into an oven with 1000 degree
Possible spelling mistake found.
celsius
. Afterwards, they are
Possible spelling mistake. 'coloured' is British English.
coloured
to look more gorgeous.
Subsequently
, they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
go through a firing process to maintain the
Possible spelling mistake. 'colour' is British English.
colour
. The process ends when complete clay
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pots
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bought
and sought by human beings.
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IELTS academic The process below shows one of the way to make clay pots

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
168 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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