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The population of japanese people

The population of japanese people GlQYm
The provided bar and table graphs illustrate the percentage of the population who are 65 years old or over in Japan during a decade. The data is given into millions. Overall, it is evidently seen that the highest population of senior citizens in 2005; however, the lowest population falls within the year 1950. Interestingly, in the table chart the minimum range of 65 years aged in 1950, but the maximum proportion is in 2055. Apparently, there is a slope of trajectory, at starting of the period population accounted for 84. 1 millions then the figure inclines gradually and meet the peak value that is 127. 8 in 2005 this is the highest value as compared to the other years. Unfortunately, the number of japanese people declined slightly after the year of 2005 and equals to 89. 9 millions in the end of the time. On the other hand, the data is callibirated in the form of table chart it includes only 4 years that is 1950, 2005, 2035 and 2055. During first year the average of grey people was 4. 1 millions and the total percen was 4. 9%. Moreover, in the middle the data is shown within the range of 20% to 35% respectively. At last, it is estimated that in the future 36. 5 millions of the senior citizens will become a part of japan's population and the proportion will be approximately 41. 0%.
The provided bar and table graphs illustrate the percentage of the
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population
who are 65 years
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old
or over in Japan during a decade. The data is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
into millions.

Overall
, it is
evidently
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
of senior citizens in 2005;
however
, the lowest
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population
falls within the
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year
1950.
Interestingly
, in the table chart the minimum range of 65 years aged in 1950,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the maximum proportion is in 2055.

Apparently
, there is a slope of trajectory, at starting of the period
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
accounted for 84. 1
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millions
then the figure inclines
gradually
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the peak value
that is
127. 8 in 2005 this is the highest value as compared to the other years. Unfortunately, the number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
japanese
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
declined
slightly
after the
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year
of 2005 and equals to 89. 9
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millions
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the time.

On the other hand
, the data is
Possible spelling mistake found.
callibirated
in the form of table chart it includes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
4 years
that is
1950, 2005, 2035 and 2055. During
first
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year
the average of
Possible spelling mistake. 'grey' is British English.
grey
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people
was 4. 1
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millions
and the total
Possible spelling mistake found.
percen
was 4. 9%.
Moreover
, in the middle the data
is shown
within the range of 20% to 35%
respectively
. At last, it
is estimated
that in the future 36. 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
of the senior citizens will become a part of japan's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
and the proportion will be approximately 41. 0%.

IELTS academic The population of japanese people

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
236 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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