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The bar chart presents the percentage of people aged 25-34 who have rented or had their own houses in UK

The bar chart presents the percentage of people aged 25-34 who have rented or had their own houses in UK NM5Og
The bar chart presents the percentage of people aged 25-34 who have rented or had their own houses in UK. Especially, it shows this change from 2004-2014. Overall, the proportion of home owners is decreasing, whereas the renters are increasing considerably. According to the chart, the number of home owners has declined significantly since 2004. In 2004, roughly 60% possessed home, but in 2014 this plunged to under 40%. Over eleven-year period, it went down steadily, which was more substantially from 2009 to 2014. Particularly in 2011 and 2012, the percent of home owners was approximately maintain at 40%. Nonetheless, the renters has risen dramatically from 2004 to 2014. There was a consistent increase in most years, which has just changed by few rate each year. Similar to home owners, it was stay over 40% in 2011 and 2012. Certainly, the percentage of renters grasped a peak at under 50% in 2014.
The bar chart presents the percentage of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
aged 25-34 who have rented or had their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
in UK.
Especially
, it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
from 2004-2014.

Overall
, the proportion of home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners
is decreasing, whereas the renters are increasing
considerably
.

According to the chart, the number of home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners
has declined
significantly
since 2004. In 2004, roughly 60% possessed home,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
in 2014 this plunged to under 40%. Over eleven-year period, it went down
steadily
, which was more
substantially
from 2009 to 2014.
Particularly
in 2011 and 2012, the percent of home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners
was approximately
Consider using a past participle here: "maintained".
maintain
at 40%.

Nonetheless, the renters has risen
dramatically
from 2004 to 2014. There was a consistent increase in most years, which has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
by
Possible agreement error. The noun rate seems to be countable; consider using: "few rates".
few rate
each year. Similar to home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
owners
, it was
Consider using a past participle here: "staid", "stayed".
stay
over 40% in 2011 and 2012.
Certainly
, the percentage of renters grasped a peak at under 50% in 2014.
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IELTS academic The bar chart presents the percentage of people aged 25-34 who have rented or had their own houses in UK

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
152 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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