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The pie charts show the percentage of males and females working in three different sectors in 2007.

The pie charts show the percentage of males and females working in three different sectors in 2007. alk7V
The given pie charts illustrate the proportion of men and women who work in agriculture, services, and industry in country A and B in 2007. Overall, although both men and women in country A like to work in services, they always balance between sectors. Meanwhile, in country B, they tend to work in services than other sectors. In-country A, the proportion of men working in services was higher than women doing this, about 2%. However, Men accounted for 27%, whereas women made up a slightly bigger fraction of 30% in agriculture. Meanwhile, both genders were the same percentage of working in the industry. In-country B, as for services, the proportion of males was 65%, the figure for females was significantly higher, at 85%. In terms of agriculture, the figure for men was double in size as the women, at 28%. Interestingly, the rate of women who worked in the industry was 1% while the men were 15%
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
pie charts illustrate the proportion of
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men
and
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women
who work in agriculture,
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services
, and industry in country A and B in 2007.

Overall
, although both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
in country A like to work in
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services
, they always balance between sectors. Meanwhile, in country B, they tend to work in
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services
than other sectors.

In-country A, the proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
working in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
was higher than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
doing this, about 2%.
However
,
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Men
accounted for 27%, whereas
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women
made up a
slightly
bigger fraction of 30% in agriculture. Meanwhile, both genders were the same percentage of working in the industry.

In-country B, as for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
, the proportion of males was 65%, the figure for females was
significantly
higher, at 85%. In terms of agriculture, the figure for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
was
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double in size
as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
, at 28%.
Interestingly
, the rate of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
who worked in the industry was 1% while the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
men
were 15%
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IELTS academic The pie charts show the percentage of males and females working in three different sectors in 2007.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
156 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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