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The pie charts illustrate the way in which energy used by the average Australian household and emitting greenhouse gas by using energy.

The pie charts illustrate the way in which energy used by the average Australian household and emitting greenhouse gas by using energy. nxdln
The pie charts illustrate the way in which energy used by the average Australian household and emitting greenhouse gas by using energy. Overall, it is clear that the major consumption of energy was made by Australia is heating however, it released less green house gas. Even though water heating consumption was second highest it release high greenhouse gas compared to all other energies. Looking in to the detail, water heating consumption accounted for 30% and experienced a release of 32% greenhouse gas. Australia used 7% energy of refrigeration whereas, it releases high greenhouse gas which of 14%. On the other hand, other appliances consumes energy up to 15%. and emits gas emission at about 28%. Energy consumption from cooling and lighting were at 2% and 4%, respectively, and both releases green house gas at 3% and 8%. consumption from heating which comprised just over a two fifths of Australian household and experienced a decrease in green house gas which is of 15%
The pie charts illustrate the way in which
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energy
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by the average Australian household and emitting
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greenhouse
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gas
by using energy.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the major
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consumption
of
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energy
was made
by Australia is
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heating
however
, it released less green
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
.
“Even though” at the beginning of a sentence requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Even though
water
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heating
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consumption
was second highest it
Did you mean "releases"?
release
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
compared to all other energies.

Looking in to the detail, water
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heating
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consumption
accounted for 30% and experienced a
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release
of 32%
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
. Australia
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
7%
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energy
of refrigeration whereas, it
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releases
high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
greenhouse
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
which of 14%.
On the other hand
, other appliances consumes
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energy
up to 15%.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
and
emits
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gas
emission at about 28%.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Energy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
consumption
from cooling and lighting were at 2% and 4%,
respectively
, and both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
releases
green
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
at 3% and 8%.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
consumption
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
heating
which comprised
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over a two fifths of Australian household and experienced a decrease in green
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
gas
which is of 15%
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IELTS academic The pie charts illustrate the way in which energy used by the average Australian household and emitting greenhouse gas by using energy.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
161 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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