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The pie chart indicates that there are 4 main reasons for land degradation in the world.

The pie chart indicates that there are 4 main reasons for land degradation in the world. 5690p
The pie chart indicates that there are 4 main reasons for land degradation in the world. The first main reason is over-grazing with 35%. The second is deforestation. In fact cutting down the trees induces 30% land degradation. The third reason related to over-cultivation which participate 28% in degradation. The other 7% estimated for other causes. Based on the table, the impacts of these 3 main causes differentiated on different regions during the 1990s. Over-grazing had the biggest role in Oceanian lands (11. 3%) while it had only 1. 5% effect on North American lands. In addition, deforestation caused degrading in Europe about 9. 8%, however, this amount was only 0. 2 and 1. 7 in North America and Oceania respectively. Furthermore, although over-cultivation had not any role in Oceania degradation, 7. 7% of European degradation occured by this reason. In conclusion, Europe had the most land degradation in 1990s with 23% in total. Oceania and North America with totally 13% and 5% of degradation were stand in next.
The pie chart indicates that there are 4 main reasons for
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land
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degradation
in the world. The
first
main reason is over-grazing with 35%.
Three successive sentences begin with the same word. Consider rewording the sentence or use a thesaurus to find a synonym.
The
second is deforestation. In fact cutting down the trees induces 30%
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land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degradation
. The third reason related to over-cultivation which participate 28% in
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degradation
. The other 7% estimated for other causes.

Based on the table, the impacts of these 3 main causes differentiated on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
regions during the 1990s. Over-grazing had the biggest role in
Possible spelling mistake found.
Oceanian
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lands
(11. 3%) while it had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
1. 5% effect on North American lands.

In addition
, deforestation caused degrading in Europe about 9. 8%,
however
, this amount was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
0. 2 and 1. 7 in North America and Oceania
respectively
.

Furthermore
, although over-cultivation had not any role in Oceania
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degradation
, 7. 7% of European
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degradation
Possible spelling mistake. Did you mean "occurred", the past tense form of the verb 'occur'?
occured
by this reason.

In conclusion
, Europe had the most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
land
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degradation
The article is probably missing here: "in the 1990s".
in 1990s
with 23% in total. Oceania and North America with
totally
13% and 5% of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
degradation
Did you mean "where" or "we"?
were
Consider using a past participle here: "stood".
stand
in
next
.
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IELTS academic The pie chart indicates that there are 4 main reasons for land degradation in the world.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
169 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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