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the pie chart diagram that shows different daily intake of sodium sugar and saturated fat in percent

the pie chart diagram that shows different daily intake of sodium sugar and saturated fat in percent 8xwYG
The give pie charts illustrate the amount of three different type of substances(sodium, saturated fat and added sugar) consumed by an average person in a day through meals and snacks. There are the average reports of USA. Overall, Consumption of sodium and saturated fat is almost similar throughout out the meals of the day but added sugar have a different ratio of percentage in different meal. the chat is divided in four different meals that is breakfast, dinner, lunch, and snacks. Each meal have differ ratio of substance comparatively In the very first one chart it shows the consumption of sodium in lunch and breakfast is identical 14% but for the lunch and dinner its much higher (29% and 43%). in case of saturated fat the intake in dinner lunch snacks and breakfast is almost similar that is 21%, 16%, 26% and 37%. For the added sugar the overall intake is highest during snacks which is 42%of the total intake of the day. In breakfast it similar to all the other food substances which is 16%. During lunch and dinner hours the added sugar consumption is much lower then any other substance present in the food which is only 19% and 23%
The give pie charts illustrate the amount of three
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
type of substances(sodium, saturated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
added
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar)
consumed by an average person in a day through
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meals
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
snacks
. There are the average reports
A determiner is probably missing here: "of the USA".
of USA
.

Overall
, Consumption of sodium and saturated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
is almost similar throughout out the
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meals
of the day
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
added
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
have a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
ratio of percentage in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
the
chat
is divided
in four
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meals
that is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breakfast
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dinner
, lunch, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
snacks
. Each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
meal
have
Use past participle here: "differed".
differ
ratio of substance
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
comparatively


In the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
first
one chart it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the consumption of sodium in lunch and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breakfast
is identical 14%
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
for the lunch and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dinner
its much higher (29% and 43%).
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
case of saturated
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
the intake in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dinner
lunch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
snacks
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
breakfast
is almost similar
that is
21%, 16%, 26% and 37%.

For the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
added
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
the
overall
intake is highest during
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
snacks
which is 42%of the total intake of the day. In
The comma is probably missing here: "breakfast, it".
breakfast it
similar to all the other food substances which is 16%. During lunch and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dinner
hours the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
added
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
consumption is much
Did you mean "lower than"?
lower then
any other substance present in the food which is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
19% and 23%

IELTS academic the pie chart diagram that shows different daily intake of sodium sugar and saturated fat in percent

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
201 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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