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The pie chart depicts the sources of air pollution. This is accompanied by a bar graph illustrating the number of deaths that have occurred in various countries due to air pollution in the year 2015.

The pie chart depicts the sources of air pollution. This is accompanied by a bar graph illustrating the number of deaths that have occurred in various countries due to air pollution in the year 2015. A3W1l
The pie chart depicts the sources of air pollution. This is accompanied by a bar graph illustrating the number of deaths that have occurred in various countries due to air pollution in the year 2015. Overall, the major proportion of air pollution is due to dust and construction, whereas domestic cooking accounts for a lower proportion. The highest no. of deaths occurred in India were high, while it was low in Brazil. The key sources of air pollution was caused by dust and construction, which is 45%. Waste burning causes 17%, while domestic cooking causes 7% which was half the proportion of the transport. Diesel generators and industries account for approximately equal proportions. The no. of deaths occurred in India was 4. 2milliions, which was double than china. Pakistan has 0. 82 million deaths, approximately 0. 1 million more when compared with Nigeria and Indonesia. The countries like USA, Conga and Brazil has nearly half million deaths
The pie chart depicts the sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
. This
is accompanied
by a bar graph illustrating the number of deaths that have occurred in various countries due to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
in the year 2015.

Overall
, the major proportion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
is due to dust and construction, whereas domestic cooking accounts for a lower proportion. The highest no. of deaths occurred in India were high, while it was low in Brazil.

The key sources of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
air
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
pollution
was caused
by dust and construction, which is 45%. Waste burning causes 17%, while domestic cooking causes 7% which was half the proportion of the transport. Diesel generators and industries account for approximately equal proportions.

The no. of deaths occurred in India was 4. 2milliions, which was
Use "doubler" to make a comparison with this adjective.
double
than china. Pakistan has 0. 82 million deaths, approximately 0. 1 million more when compared with Nigeria and Indonesia. The countries
A determiner is probably missing here: "like the USA".
like USA
, Conga and Brazil has
nearly
half million
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
deaths
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IELTS academic The pie chart depicts the sources of air pollution. This is accompanied by a bar graph illustrating the number of deaths that have occurred in various countries due to air pollution in the year 2015.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
156 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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