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The map shows the plan of the city of Brandfield with two possible sites’ locations for a shopping mall.

The map shows the plan of the city of Brandfield with two possible sites’ locations for a shopping mall. yXPVD
The map shows the plan of the city of Brandfield with two possible sites’ locations for a shopping mall. It can be seen that both sites under consideration and located in the north and the south-east of the town. The first site (S1) placed in the north of the Brandfield between the river and the road, which run from the south-west and south-east respectively. So if the mall is built there, it will convenient for people from housing estate for access because it is next to it. The second site is in the south-east (S2), the railway, which stretch from the north-west of the town, can be observed on the right side of it. Furthermore, this land lies pretty close to the downtown with industrial estate on the other side of the rail line. The main road goes through the main part of the town and besides the both sites that will provide highway possibility. A large area in the west prevented use as a site by golf course and park construction.
The map
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the plan of the city of
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Brandfield
with two possible
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sites’
locations for a shopping mall. It can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
under consideration and located in the north and the south-east of the town.

The
first
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site
(S1) placed in the north of the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Brandfield
between the river and the road, which run from the south-west and south-east
respectively
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
if the mall
is built
there, it
It seems that a verb or adverb has been misspelled or is missing here.
will convenient
for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from housing estate for access
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is
next
to it.

The second
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
is in the south-east (S2), the railway, which stretch from the north-west of the town, can
be observed
on the right side of it.
Furthermore
, this land lies pretty close to the downtown with industrial estate on the other side of the rail line.

The main road goes through the main part of the town and
besides
the both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
that will provide highway possibility.

A large area in the west
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
prevented
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
as a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
site
by golf course and park construction.

IELTS academic The map shows the plan of the city of Brandfield with two possible sites’ locations for a shopping mall.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
172 words
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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