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The line graph shows information about the salary players of three sports received on a yearly basis (measured in dollars) over a period of 31 years from 1970 to 2000.

The line graph shows information about the salary players of three sports received on a yearly basis (measured in dollars) over a period of 31 years from 1970 to 2000. ElYLD
The presented graph gives information on the number of money which the athletes of three sports namely Baseball, Football, and Basketball acquired annually year over the course of 31 years starting from 1970. It is clear that the player’s salaries showed an upward trend between 1970 and 2000. And the earning of Basketball hit the highest point at 2400000 dollars. In 1970, while the pay of two kinds of sports players such as Football and Baseball were 100000 dollars, the salary of Basketball was only half of the other 2 sports butts. The amount of money that basketball players earn each year has increased rapidly to more than two million three hundred thousand dollars in just 31 years. Although the annual salary of baseball players is increasing steadily, in 1995, this number tended to decrease to only nearly seven hundred thousand dollars. Besides, football players year by year also raised their salary above 2 million dollars in the last year of this survey.
The presented graph gives information on the number of money which the athletes of three sports
namely
Baseball, Football, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Basketball
acquired
annually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
over the course of 31 years starting from 1970.

It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
player’s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
an upward trend between 1970 and 2000. And the earning of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Basketball
hit the highest point at 2400000 dollars.

In 1970, while the pay of two kinds of sports
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
such as Football and Baseball were 100000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Basketball
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
half of the other 2 sports butts. The amount of money that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
basketball
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
earn each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
has increased
rapidly
to more than two million three hundred thousand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
31 years.

Although the annual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
of baseball
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
players
is increasing
steadily
, in 1995, this number tended to decrease to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
nearly
seven hundred thousand
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
.
Besides
, football
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players
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
also
raised their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
above 2 million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in the last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
of this survey.

IELTS academic The line graph shows information about the salary players of three sports received on a yearly basis (measured in dollars) over a period of 31 years from 1970 to 2000.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
163 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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