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The line graph illustrates, a comparative analysis of the number of home students and international learners in three consecutive years that is 2010, 2011 and 2012, which are separately represented for men and women.

The line graph illustrates, a comparative analysis of the number of home students and international learners in three consecutive years that is 2010, 2011 and 2012, which are separately represented for men and women. G3gQm
The line graph illustrates, a comparative analysis of the number of home students and international learners in three consecutive years that is 2010, 2011 and 2012, which are separately represented for men and women. It can be clearly seen that, number of international male and female students were quite less compared to native students until 2012. In 2012, the number of international and native male students were almost the same. In 2012, the number of women learners from Britain were 45, which is the highest figure in the graph, varying just by nearly one or two more, from that of the year 2011, which was a little lesser in 2010, approximately 32. Moreover, Britain's women count is the highest in the graph. In the year 2012, the count of native male students was almost the same as that of females, ie. 42, which is the highest figure among all male students. This figure was not very different from that of 2010, which was 39. But the figure had inclined down rapidly in 2011 by making it almost half to 24. The graph shows that the number of international male students had been raised drastically to 39 by the year 2012, which was 24 in 2011 and 20 in 2010. This was the highest figure, when it comes to international students, was little less compared to that of the native male students in that year and almost double than that of international female candidates of the corresponding year. The graph of international women has slowly grown to 20 by 2012, which was 18 in 2011 and 14 in 2010. In conclusion, among native students the females are higher in number whereas it is exactly opposite when it comes to the international students.
The line
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graph
illustrates, a comparative analysis of the
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number
of home
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students
and
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international
learners in three consecutive years
that is
2010, 2011 and 2012, which are
separately
represented for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
and
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women
. It can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that,
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number
of
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international
male and
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female
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students
were quite less compared to
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native
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
until 2012. In 2012, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
native
male
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
were
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almost
the same.

In 2012, the
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number
of
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women
learners from Britain were 45, which is the highest
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figure
in the
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graph
, varying
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by
nearly
one or two more, from that of the
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year
2011, which was a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
lesser in 2010, approximately 32.
Moreover
, Britain's
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women
count is the highest in the
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graph
. In the
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year
2012, the count of
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native
male
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students
was
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almost
the same as that of
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females
,
The abbreviation "i.e." (= that is) requires two periods.
ie.
42, which is the highest
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figure
among all male
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students
. This
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figure
was not
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very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from that of 2010, which was 39.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
the
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figure
had inclined down
rapidly
in 2011 by making it
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almost
half to 24.

The
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graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
male
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
had
been raised
drastically
to 39 by the
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year
2012, which was 24 in 2011 and 20 in 2010. This was the highest
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figure
, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to
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international
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students
, was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
less compared to that of the
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native
male
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students
in that
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year
and
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almost
double than that of
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international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
female
candidates of the corresponding
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year
. The
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graph
of
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international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
has
slowly
grown to 20 by 2012, which was 18 in 2011 and 14 in 2010.

In conclusion
, among
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native
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students
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
females
are higher in
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number
whereas it is exactly opposite when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
.
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IELTS academic The line graph illustrates, a comparative analysis of the number of home students and international learners in three consecutive years that is 2010, 2011 and 2012, which are separately represented for men and women.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
291 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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Task Achievement: 5.5
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    Present relevant ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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