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The line graph gives a conclusion of survey about the proportions of New Zealand’s population divided into 4 groups from 1950 to the present day and including projections to the year 2050.

The line graph gives a conclusion of survey about the proportions of New Zealand’s population divided into 4 groups from 1950 to the present day and including projections to the year 2050. LrwyG
The line graph gives a conclusion of survey about the proportions of New Zealand’s population divided into 4 groups from 1950 to the present day and including projections to the year 2050. From the demographical statics, it can be inferred that New Zealand has an aging population with the number of civilians aged between 38 and 64 and over 65, and fewer individuals aged below 34. It also predicted that these trends will be continue until 2050 when the majority of New Zealand will be between 35 and 64 years old. With regard to the younger age groups, children at the age of 0-14 accounted for only 5% of populations in 1950. The figures dropped insignificantly before going up to 10% in 2000, and it projected to surge to nearly a half 40 years later. While a decreasing trend was seen in group of 25 to 37 over 50-year period, the rate of people in this group plummeted remarkably to under 10% by 1990, a decrease of almost a half compared to the original amount. There will be hit a low of nearly 1% in 2050.
The line graph gives a conclusion of survey about the proportions of New Zealand’s population divided into 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
from 1950 to the present day and including projections to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
2050.

From the
Possible spelling mistake found.
demographical
statics, it can
be inferred
that New Zealand has an aging population with the number of civilians aged between 38 and 64 and over 65, and fewer individuals aged below 34. It
also
predicted that these trends will be
Consider using the past participle "continued"?
continue
until 2050 when the majority of New Zealand will be between 35 and 64 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
.

With regard to the younger age
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
, children at the age of 0-14 accounted for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
5% of populations in 1950. The figures dropped
insignificantly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
going up to 10% in 2000, and it projected to surge to
nearly
a half 40 years later. While a decreasing trend was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
of 25 to 37 over
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
50-year
period, the rate of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
plummeted
remarkably
to under 10% by 1990, a decrease of almost a half compared to the original amount. There will
be hit
a low of
nearly
1% in 2050.
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IELTS academic The line graph gives a conclusion of survey about the proportions of New Zealand’s population divided into 4 groups from 1950 to the present day and including projections to the year 2050.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
186 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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