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The line graph elucidates the information about the car thefts in the four countries like Great Britain, Sweden, France and Canada from 1990 to 1999.

The line graph elucidates the information about the car thefts in the four countries like Great Britain, Sweden, France and Canada from 1990 to 1999. oELbK
The line graph elucidates the information about the car thefts in the four countries like Great Britain, Sweden, France and Canada from 1990 to 1999. The unit is theft per thousand vehicles. To summarise, the number of people who lost their cars in Sweden increased, whereas, in Great Britain, Canada, and France, it decreased as years passed. In the year 1990, more than 15 thefts had taken place in Great Britain. It was fluctuating in the entire period. It had peaked in the year 1996 at 20 per 1000 vehicles. By the end of the period, it had reduced to somewhere around 16 thefts per year. Whereas, in 1990 there were less than 10 thefts per 1000 in Sweden. After that, it was stagnant for a few years. In the year 1995, it had increased to more than 10 per 1000. Hereafter it was steady for three years. Again, it had augmented in no. of thefts which reached somewhere around 15 per 1000. On the other hand, in Canada, more than 5 thefts per 1000 had taken place in 1990. It had reduced as years passed. By the year 1993, it fell and became steady (5 per 1000). From the year 1993 to 1999, it had gradual change. Likewise, in 1999, there were 5 per 1000 thefts in France. it had to vary in the entire period. By the end of the period, the number of thefts per thousand vehicles in Canada and France was roughly the same.
The line graph elucidates the information about the car
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thefts
in the four countries like Great Britain, Sweden, France and Canada from 1990 to 1999. The unit is
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theft
per thousand vehicles.

To
Possible spelling mistake. 'summarise' is British English.
summarise
, the number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
who lost their cars in Sweden increased, whereas, in Great Britain, Canada, and France, it decreased as years passed.

In the
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year
1990, more than 15
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thefts
had taken place in Great Britain. It was fluctuating in the entire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
. It had peaked in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1996 at 20 per 1000 vehicles. By the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
, it had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to somewhere around 16
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thefts
per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, in 1990 there were less than 10
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thefts
per 1000 in Sweden. After that, it was stagnant for a few years. In the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1995, it had increased to more than 10 per 1000. Hereafter it was steady for three years. Again, it had augmented in no. of
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thefts
which reached somewhere around 15 per 1000.

On the other hand
, in Canada, more than 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thefts
per 1000 had taken place in 1990. It had
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
as years passed. By the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1993, it fell and became steady (5 per 1000). From the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1993 to 1999, it had gradual
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
.
Likewise
, in 1999, there were 5 per 1000
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thefts
in France.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
had to vary in the entire
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
. By the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thefts
per thousand vehicles in Canada and France was roughly the same.
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IELTS academic The line graph elucidates the information about the car thefts in the four countries like Great Britain, Sweden, France and Canada from 1990 to 1999.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
248 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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