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The line graph demonstrates the numbers of arrivals to and from the United Kingdoms measured in million, while the bar chart displays country that is the most prevalent to travel by inhabitants in England.

The line graph demonstrates the numbers of arrivals to and from the United Kingdoms measured in million, while the bar chart displays country that is the most prevalent to travel by inhabitants in England. gG5Ea
The line graph demonstrates the numbers of arrivals to and from the United Kingdoms measured in million, while the bar chart displays country that is the most prevalent to travel by inhabitants in England. Overall, in the first graph, both the numbers of tourists visited the Great Britain and the times that people in this country traveled oversea experienced an upward trend. Nonetheless, most of Englishmen liked coming to France, while Turkey was the least popular destination. At the first time of the period, both of the in and out trips accounted for a very poor proportion. About 13 millions of abroad holidays was taken by English people and only 10 millions people chose England for vacation. But in the 1980s, they rose significantly. For example, in 1989, it reach over 30 millions, triple times as large as in 1979. Next, the two lines continued climbing up until the end and peaked at approximately 50 millions for the upper one and nearly 30 for the lower one in 1999. By far the most popular countries to visit in 1999 were France around 11 million visitors, followed by Spain at 9 million. The USA, Greece, and Turkey were far less popular at around 4, 3 and 2 million visitors respectively.
The line graph demonstrates the numbers of arrivals to and from the United Kingdoms measured in
Use "a million" or use a number before 'million'.
million
, while the bar chart displays country
that is
the most prevalent to travel by inhabitants in England.

Overall
, in the
first
graph, both the numbers of tourists visited the Great Britain and the times that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in this country traveled oversea experienced an upward trend. Nonetheless,
Consider using "most Englishmen" or "most of the Englishmen".
most of Englishmen
liked coming to France, while Turkey was the least popular destination.

At the
first
time of the period, both of the in and out trips accounted for a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
poor proportion. About 13
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
of abroad holidays
was taken
by English
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
10
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
chose England for vacation.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
in the 1980s, they rose
significantly
.
For example
, in 1989, it
Did you mean "reaches"?
reach
over 30
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
, triple times as large as in 1979.
Next
, the two lines continued climbing up until the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
and peaked at approximately 50
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
millions
for the upper one and
nearly
30 for the lower one in 1999.

By far the most popular countries to visit in 1999 were France around 11
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
visitors, followed by Spain at 9
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
. The USA, Greece, and Turkey were far less popular at around 4, 3 and 2
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
visitors
respectively
.
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IELTS academic The line graph demonstrates the numbers of arrivals to and from the United Kingdoms measured in million, while the bar chart displays country that is the most prevalent to travel by inhabitants in England.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
209 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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