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The line chart demonstrated how much the stocks of four technological incorporates (Facebook, Google, Apple and Yahoo) cost.

The line chart demonstrated how much the stocks of four technological incorporates (Facebook, Google, Apple and Yahoo) cost. Qla0y
The line chart demonstrated how much the stocks of four technological incorporates (Facebook, Google, Apple and Yahoo) cost. In general, Apple was the company that could sell their stock with a high price at the first place, after which the value of Facebook rose and surpassed that of Apple. While Yahoo kept decreasing over the time, Google hasn't been increasing from the bottom at all. In the first couple of years, Apple hit the peak with 35, 000 worth its value, while Facebook and Yahoo cost around 7, 000. After 2013, Facebook took the crowd and reached at 20, 000 at 2016 while Apple fluctuated and finally dropped at more than 5, 000. With regard to Yahoo, in 5 years, this company lost approximately 5, 000 of its stock price. However, Google was noticeable as its figure remained stable at the bottom.
The line chart demonstrated how much the stocks of four technological incorporates (Facebook, Google,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Apple
and Yahoo) cost.

In general
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Apple
was the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
that could sell their stock with a high price at the
first
place, after which the value of Facebook rose and surpassed that of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Apple
. While Yahoo
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
kept
decreasing over the time, Google hasn't been increasing from the bottom at all.

In the
first
couple of years,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Apple
hit the peak with 35, 000 worth its value, while Facebook and Yahoo cost around 7, 000. After 2013, Facebook took the crowd and reached at 20, 000 at 2016 while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Apple
fluctuated and
finally
dropped at more than 5, 000.

With regard to Yahoo, in 5 years, this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
lost approximately 5, 000 of its stock price.
However
, Google was noticeable as its figure remained stable at the bottom.
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IELTS academic The line chart demonstrated how much the stocks of four technological incorporates (Facebook, Google, Apple and Yahoo) cost.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
142 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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