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The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant.

The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. wl5n
An inception of the data in the line graphs reveals the number of international local students of Australian universities in terms of commencing and total quantities during the period from 2001 to 2010. From the overall perspective, it can be clearly observed that in general, the number of local students enrolled in courses throughout the period was much more significant than overseas students’. In stark contrast, the number of foreign students experienced a prompter increase in two aspects. To begin with, the quantity of international learners in total comprised 20000 in 2001, having reached just over than 80000 people by the end of the period. Despite its rapid growth, the number of local students was higher, starting from the beginning (400000) and increasing to 600000 over a 9-period time. With respect to the commencing students, the number of such overseas learners was 18 times less than local ones in 2001 (approximately 10000 and 180000 respectively). However, at the end of the period, while the former accounted for 40000, experiencing a dramatic rise, there was only a slight increase in the latter, reaching 200000.
An inception of the data in the line graphs reveals the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of international
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
of Australian universities in terms of commencing and total quantities during the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
from 2001 to 2010.

From the
overall
perspective, it can be
clearly
observed that
in general
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
enrolled in courses throughout the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
was much more significant than overseas
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students’
. In stark contrast, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
experienced a prompter increase in two aspects.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the quantity of international learners in total comprised 20000 in 2001, having reached
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
Use "(over)" to make a comparison with this adjective.
over
than 80000
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
by the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
. Despite its rapid growth, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
was higher, starting from the beginning (400000) and increasing to 600000 over a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
9-period
time.

With respect to the commencing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of such overseas learners was 18 times less than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
ones in 2001 (approximately 10000 and 180000
respectively
).
However
, at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
period
, while the former accounted for 40000, experiencing a dramatic rise, there was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
a slight increase in the latter, reaching 200000.

IELTS academic The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
183 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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