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The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words

The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. o9Vq
The line graph demonstrates the changes in admissions of local and foreign students in Australian universities from a decade. Units are measured in numbers. The trend of overseas students increased gradually from 2001, whereas local students trend remained stable from 2007 apart from gradual increasing in the beginning. Looking more closely into the graph it can be noticed that there are only 20000 overseas enrolees in 2001, and it decreases slightly in the year 2003 to 2004, consequently increasing to just above 80000 students by the year 2010. Through commencing it is observed that the enrolment started with 10000 members in 2001 which increased steadily until 2008 and then followed a constant number of 40000 On the other hand, there were 400000 admissions of locals in the universities in 2001 which increased half million students every year till 2007 to 600000 from then it is stable till 2010. Commencing reached to peak in 2002 and from then it maintained a plateau toll 2010 Overall, from the graph it is clear that local student’s enrolment remained constant while overseas admissions increasing.
The line graph demonstrates the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in admissions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
and foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
in Australian universities from a decade. Units
are measured
in numbers.

The trend of overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
increased
gradually
from 2001, whereas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
trend remained stable from 2007 apart from gradual increasing in the beginning.

Looking more
closely
into the graph it can
be noticed
that there are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
20000 overseas
Possible spelling mistake found.
enrolees
in 2001, and it decreases
slightly
in the year 2003 to 2004,
consequently
increasing to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
above 80000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
by the year 2010. Through commencing it
is observed
that the
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolment' is British English.
enrolment
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
with 10000 members in 2001 which increased
steadily
until 2008 and then followed a constant number of 40000

On the other hand
, there were 400000 admissions of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
locals
in the universities in 2001 which increased half million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
every year till 2007 to 600000 from then it is stable till 2010. Commencing reached to peak in 2002 and from then it maintained a plateau toll 2010

Overall
, from the graph it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
student’s
Possible spelling mistake. 'enrolment' is British English.
enrolment
remained constant while overseas admissions increasing.
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IELTS academic The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
180 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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  • The graphs below show the enrolments of overseas students and local students in Australian universities over a ten year period. Summarise the information by selecting and reporting the main features, and make comparisons where relevant. You should write at least 150 words