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The graph shows US sports players’ salaries in dollars.

The graph shows US sports players’ salaries in dollars. aJ88Y
The graph shows US sports players’ annual salaries in dollars in three different sports: basketball, baseball and football. Looking at the graph, it is obvious that the line chart experienced an upward trend. It is also noticeable that basketball registered the lowest players’ salaries, while baseball was the highest among the 3 sports. The figure for basketball players' salaries climbed steadily from approximately 100, 000 dollars in 1970 to more than 300, 000 dollars in 1980 and overtook the number of baseballers' salaries. Then it experienced a sudden rise to 1, 000, 000 dollars in 1990. In the end, a significant increase of 1, 400, 000 dollars was seen the basketball players' salaries. The baseballers' annual salaries in dollars witnessed a gentle growth from about 100, 000 dollars in 1970 to 400, 000 dollars in 1980, then it went up sharply to 800, 000 dollars in 1990. After that, it rose dramatically to more than 1, 500, 000 in the year 2000. While in the figure for football players' salaries, there was a gradual increase from 200, 000 dollars to approximately 500, 000 dollars over 20 years, starting in 1970. Then this figure climbed considerably to 780, 000 dollars in 1995, subsequently leveled off and dropped to roughly 750, 000 dollars in 2000.
The graph
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
US sports players’ annual
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salaries
in
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dollars
in three
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
sports:
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basketball
, baseball and football.

Looking at the graph, it is obvious that the line chart experienced an upward trend. It is
also
noticeable that
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basketball
registered the lowest players’
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salaries
, while baseball was the highest among the 3 sports.

The figure for
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basketball
players'
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salaries
climbed
steadily
from approximately 100, 000
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dollars
in 1970 to more than 300, 000
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dollars
in 1980 and overtook the number of
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baseballers
'
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salaries
. Then it experienced a sudden rise to 1, 000, 000
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dollars
in 1990. In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
, a significant increase of 1, 400, 000
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dollars
was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
the
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basketball
players'
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salaries
. The
Possible spelling mistake found.
baseballers
' annual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
witnessed a gentle growth from about 100, 000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 1970 to 400, 000
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dollars
in 1980, then it went up
sharply
to 800, 000
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dollars
in 1990. After that, it rose
dramatically
to more than 1, 500, 000 in the year 2000.

While in the figure for football players'
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
, there was a gradual increase from 200, 000
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dollars
to approximately 500, 000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
over 20 years, starting in 1970. Then this figure climbed
considerably
to 780, 000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 1995,
subsequently
leveled off and dropped to roughly 750, 000
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
dollars
in 2000.
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IELTS academic The graph shows US sports players’ salaries in dollars.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
213 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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