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The graph shows the recycling rate of materials from 1982-2010

The graph shows the recycling rate of materials from 1982-2010 GM8Dx
The graph above shows the information of Recycling rate for selected materials: 1982-2010. Materials that Recycled are Paper and Cardboard, Glass containers, Aluminum cans and Plastic. The date measures in Percent. First, Paper and Cardboard and Glass Containers look like a mirror image of each other. That paper and cardboard had net change of zero percent from year 1982 to 1986. While Glass containers had negative change in percent that is nearly 10%. Furthermore, between year 1990 to 1994 their is hike in Recycling rate of paper and cardboard that is 7%. While the similar effect of change is observed in Glass containers. whilst moving from year 1998 to 2010 their is reduction of percentage change in paper and cardboard and climbing seem in glass containers, that is net percentage changes are 15% decreased 13% increased. Second, Aluminum cans start gaining height at the end of 1982. Staring from 0% and rocket up to 45% to the start of year 2010. while calculating the net percentage change of aluminum cans that is approximate 48%, that is the only positive factor which is highly recycled. At the end, the plastics is only material which is straightforward, throughout the all years it is look like a straight line in the graph. To sum up, the consistent recycling is only observe in aluminum cans. While paper and cardboard and glass containers are mirror applications to each other, and plastic are straight line throughout the all years.
The graph above
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
the information of Recycling rate for selected materials: 1982-2010. Materials that Recycled are Paper and Cardboard,
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Glass
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containers
,
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Aluminum
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cans
and Plastic. The date measures in Percent.

First
, Paper and Cardboard and
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Glass
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Containers
look like a mirror image of each other. That paper and cardboard had net
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change
of zero percent from
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year
1982 to 1986.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
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Glass
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containers
had
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negative
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change
in percent
that is
nearly
10%.
Furthermore
, between
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year
1990 to 1994
Did you mean "there"?
their
is hike in Recycling rate of paper and cardboard
that is
7%.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
the similar effect of
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change
is observed
in
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Glass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
containers
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
whilst
moving from
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year
1998 to 2010
Did you mean "there"?
their
is reduction of percentage
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change
in paper and cardboard and climbing seem in
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glass
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containers
,
that is
net percentage
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changes
are 15% decreased 13% increased.

Second,
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Aluminum
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cans
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start
gaining height at the
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end
of 1982. Staring from 0% and rocket up to 45% to the
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start
of
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year
2010.
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while
calculating the net percentage
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change
of
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aluminum
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cans
that is
approximate 48%,
that is
the
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only
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positive
factor which is
highly
recycled. At the
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end
, the plastics is
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only
material which is straightforward, throughout the all years it is look like a straight line in the graph.

To sum up, the consistent recycling is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
observe in
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aluminum
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cans
. While paper and cardboard and
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glass
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
containers
are mirror applications to each other, and plastic are straight line throughout the all years.
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IELTS academic The graph shows the recycling rate of materials from 1982-2010

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
243 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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