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The graph shows the percentage of parttime workers in each country of united kingdom

The graph shows the percentage of parttime workers in each country of united kingdom OVl53
The Bar graph gives information about the percentage of people who have part time jobs in four countries ( England, Northern Ireland, Scotland and wales ) of United kingdom in the year 1980 and 2010. Units are measured in percentage. Overall in both years 1980 & 2010 wales and England had highest percentage of part time workers than that of Northern Ireland and scotland. In scotland there has generally been a small increase in parttime workers from 1980 to 2010, expect in Northern ireland. In 1980, more than 20% of people in england worked part time. The only country with a greater percentage of workers doing part time job was wales, with around 33%. Both the countries saw an increase in percentage of people working part time in 2010. In wales percentage rose to just over 35% and in england the percentage rose to over 30%. Scotland had the lowest percentage of parttime workers in 1980, with just over 10%. However his rose to almost 20% which is a significant increase. Lastly Northern Ireland was the only country which had a decreasing percentage of part time workers. In 1980 it had around 15% of people working parttime. This decreased by couple of percent in 2010.
The Bar graph gives information about the
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percentage
of
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people
who have
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part
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time
jobs in four
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countries
Don't put a space after the opening parenthesis
(
England, Northern Ireland, Scotland and wales
Don't put a space before the closing parenthesis
)
of
The proper noun "United Kingdom" needs to be capitalized.
United kingdom
in the year 1980 and 2010. Units
are measured
in percentage.

Overall
in both years 1980 & 2010 wales and England had
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highest
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percentage
of
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part
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time
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workers
than that of Northern Ireland and
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scotland
. In
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scotland
there has
generally
been a
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small
increase in
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parttime
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workers
from 1980 to 2010,
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expect
in
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
Northern ireland
.

In 1980, more than 20% of
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people
in
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england
worked
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part
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time
. The
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only
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country
with a greater
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percentage
of
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workers
doing
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part
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time
job was wales, with around 33%. Both the
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countries
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
saw
an increase in
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percentage
of
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people
working
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part
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time
in 2010. In wales
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percentage
rose to
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just
over 35% and in
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england
the
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percentage
rose to over 30%.

Scotland had the lowest
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percentage
of
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parttime
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workers
in 1980, with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 10%.
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However
his rose to almost 20% which is a significant increase.
Lastly
Northern Ireland was the
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only
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country
which had a decreasing
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percentage
of
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part
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time
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workers
. In
The comma is probably missing here: "1980, it".
1980 it
had around 15% of
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people
working
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parttime
. This decreased by couple of percent in 2010.
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IELTS academic The graph shows the percentage of parttime workers in each country of united kingdom

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
205 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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Lexical Resource: 5.0
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
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