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The graph shows the information about the time used by children on television from 1950 to 2010.

The graph shows the information about the time used by children on television from 1950 to 2010. mWMj1
The rentered line graph represents the information about the count of hours each day used by children on television, from the year 1950 to 2010. The data has been caliberated in nymbers. From an overall analysis in the beggining the number of hours spend per day by children was the lowest. While, in 2010 it was the highest. It is vivid that, in the year 1950, the least number of children preferred to watching television. while in 1960, children used to watching tv for one hour per da. It showed on increased as compared to 1950. Moreover, in coming years it was rapidly increased. in the year 1970, children loved to watching television for 2hours per day and it remains increased. Carrying forward, in the year 1980, the number of hours per day spent by children was 14, which showed use and fall till 1990. after the year 199, it remained constant and the figure was 4 hours each day. Furthermore in 2000, childrens used to watching to for 3-5 hours each day. While in 2018, it was decreased and reported with 3 hours each day.
The
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rentered
line graph represents the information about the count of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
each day
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
on television, from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1950 to 2010. The data has been
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caliberated
in
Possible spelling mistake found.
nymbers
. From an
overall
analysis in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
beggining
the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
spend per day by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
was the lowest.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
, in 2010 it was the highest. It is vivid that, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1950, the least number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
preferred to watching television.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
while
in 1960,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to watching
Possible spelling mistake found.
tv
for one
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hour
per
Possible spelling mistake found.
da
. It
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
on increased as compared to 1950.
Moreover
, in coming years it was
rapidly
increased.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
in
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1970,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loved
to watching television for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
2hours
per day and it remains increased. Carrying forward, in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
1980, the number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
per day spent by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
was 14, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
and fall till 1990.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
after
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
199, it remained constant and the figure was 4
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
each day.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Furthermore
in 2000,
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to watching to for 3-5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
each day. While in 2018, it
was decreased
and reported with 3
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hours
each day.
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IELTS academic The graph shows the information about the time used by children on television from 1950 to 2010.

Academic
  American English
1 paragraphs
186 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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