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The graph shows changes in the number of London underground Station passengers in one day

The graph shows changes in the number of London underground Station passengers in one day BJaN5
The line graph gives information about changes of the number of London  Subway station passengers  in a single day from 6 am to 22. 00 pm. Overall, it can be seen that most people get to the station at 8: 00 wheras the least number of people get at 16: 00. At 06: 00 in the morning 100 people get to the London Subway Station and its number increases gradually until it reaches a peak of 400 people at 08: 00.   From 08: 00 to 10: 00 numbers decrease gradually and from 10: 00 to 12: 00 it increases again until they remain constant at 12: 00, 13: 00 and 14: 00 with about 300 passengers. There is a huge decline at 16: 00 with only 100 people getting to the Station.   However,   from that time to 18: 00 the number of people goes up dramatically with 200 passengers at 17: 00 and 300 passengers at 18: 00. In the evenings and at nights  there is a less number of people going to the Subway.
The line graph gives information about
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changes
of the
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number
of London
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Subway
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station
passengers
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in a single day from 6 am to 22. 00 pm.

Overall
, it can be
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seen
that most
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to the
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station
at 8: 00
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wheras
the least
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number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
at 16: 00.

At 06: 00 in the morning 100
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
to the London Subway
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Station
and its
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number
increases
gradually
until it reaches a peak of 400
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people
at 08: 00.
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From 08: 00 to 10: 00
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numbers
decrease
gradually
and from 10: 00 to 12: 00 it increases again until they remain constant at 12: 00, 13: 00 and 14: 00 with about 300 passengers.

There is a huge decline at 16: 00 with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
100
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
getting to the
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Station
.
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However
,
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from that time to 18: 00 the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
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people
goes up
dramatically
with 200 passengers at 17: 00 and 300 passengers at 18: 00. In the evenings and at nights
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there is a less
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
going to the Subway.
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IELTS academic The graph shows changes in the number of London underground Station passengers in one day

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
178 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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