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The graph shows a comparison in the pulse rate changes between two different individuals of different ages and professions.

The line chart illustrates the differences of a number of variation in pulse rate by comparing the two different people by considering Various categries such as their Professions as well as ages. Overall, It can be observed that both the personalities value is not more than eighty beats during the intial period and last stage. Moreover, The number of survival levels reached over the highest value while during average of minutes rather than other intervals of the time. It is pellucid that, The Mabel pulses are intially commence with value of more or less sixty followed by there arises significant rose by just 80 per minute till 2 minutes period and trend line dramatically surged up further also reached peak value within range of 140 to 160. on the other hand, there exist a sudden decline over the next two period by 100 and 80 beats per minute approximately. Turning towards the young athelete, Mr. Albert who is 28 years old and former college athlete. During the time interval of two minutes, The Rate of pulses are inclined certainly to the value of 120 which is twenty times smaller the old office worker. Evidently, There shows marginal decrease with a number of fluctuations untill the end of the experiment.
The line chart illustrates the differences of a number of variation in pulse rate by comparing the two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
by considering

Various
Possible spelling mistake found.
categries
such as their Professions
as well
as ages.

Overall
, It can
be observed
that both the personalities
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
is not more than eighty beats during the
Possible spelling mistake found.
intial
period and last stage.
Moreover
, The number of survival levels reached over the highest
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
while during average of minutes
rather


This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
than
other intervals of the time.

It is pellucid that, The Mabel pulses are
Possible spelling mistake found.
intially
commence with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
of more or less sixty followed by there arises significant rose by
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
80 per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minute
till 2 minutes period and trend line
dramatically
surged up
further
also
reached peak
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
within range of 140 to 160.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter.
on
the other hand, there exist a sudden decline over the
next
two period by 100 and 80 beats per
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
minute
approximately.

Turning towards the young
Possible spelling mistake found.
athelete
, Mr. Albert who is 28 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
and former college athlete. During the time interval of two minutes, The Rate of pulses
Possible agreement error.
are
inclined
certainly
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
value
of 120 which is twenty times smaller the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
office worker.
Evidently
, There
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
marginal decrease with a number of fluctuations
Possible spelling mistake found.
untill
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the experiment.
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IELTS academic The graph shows a comparison in the pulse rate changes between two different individuals of different ages and professions.

Academic
  American English
5 paragraphs
209 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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