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The graph below shows the viewership of different TV programs among three different age groups.

The graph below shows the viewership of different TV programs among three different age groups. oAgX
The sets of pie chart illustrate the proportion of different age groups watched various television programs. Observing the details, more than quarter(26%) of 10-15 years old prefer to watch sport and cartoon programs; whereas, drama is liked by more than one fifth (23%). However, only 6% people watch to see news in the age between 10 and 15. For 16-20 years old, drama programs are more popular among them. Around 30% of 16-20 years old watch drama on television; whereas, sports and cartoons are less popular among them. Approximately 23% and 18% of 16-20 years old people prefer to see films and news on television respectively. Focusing on 21-25 years old, exact one third citizens like to enjoy news; while, nearly one fifth are watching drama, cartoon and film programs on television. By contrast, only 4% people like sports. Overall, it can be clearly seen that, youngster more prefer to watch news; while, 10-15 years old more like to watch sports and cartoons on television.
The sets of pie chart illustrate the proportion of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
age groups
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
various
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television
programs.

Observing the
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details
, more than quarter(26%) of 10-15 years
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old
prefer to
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watch
sport and
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cartoon
programs; whereas,
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drama
is liked
by more than one fifth (23%).
However
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
6%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
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watch
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
in the age between 10 and 15. For 16-20 years
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
,
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drama
programs are more popular among them. Around 30% of 16-20 years
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
drama
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
; whereas, sports and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cartoons
are less popular among them. Approximately 23% and 18% of 16-20 years
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
prefer to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
films and
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news
on
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television
respectively
.

Focusing on 21-25 years
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old
, exact one third citizens like to enjoy
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news
; while,
nearly
one fifth are watching
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drama
,
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cartoon
and film programs on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
. By contrast,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
4%
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
like sports.

Overall
, it can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that, youngster more prefer to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
news
; while, 10-15 years
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
old
more like to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
watch
sports and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cartoons
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the viewership of different TV programs among three different age groups.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
165 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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