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The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries. jgn8
The line graph illustrates the percentage of 65 years and older population for three countries during the period 1940 to 2040. According to the diagram, the elderly population is growing through this period, in all the countries, namely Japan, Sweden and USA. As the figures represent, the population of this age group was among 5 to 9 percent for three countries at 1940, such that USA stands at the first place followed by Sweden and Japan respectively. It is predicted that at 2040, the ranks will change so that Japan ranks first, with almost 27 percent share of 65 plus years residents, and Sweden accounts for the second position, hosting 25 percent elderlies. The USA will also be home to 23 percent of its population at this age group. This transition occurs while USA experiences the least alternations and follows a steady increasing trend. On the other hand, the figures for Sweden fluctuate dramatically, until finally reaching that of USA at nearly 2000. However, Japan starts with a declining pattern, which gradually undergoes an incline at 1987 and makes a sharp rise in 2030, whereas its 65 years old population goes beyond that of two other countries at the same period.
The line graph illustrates the percentage of 65 years and older
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
for three
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
during the period 1940 to 2040.

According to the diagram, the elderly
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
is growing through this period, in all the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
,
namely
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
, Sweden and USA.

As the figures represent, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
of this age group was among 5 to 9
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
for three
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
at 1940, such that USA stands at the
first
place followed by Sweden and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
respectively
. It
is predicted
that at 2040, the ranks will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
ranks
first
, with almost 27
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
share of 65 plus years residents, and Sweden accounts for the second position, hosting 25
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
Possible spelling mistake found.
elderlies
. The USA will
also
be home to 23
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percent
of its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
at this age group.

This transition occurs while USA experiences the least alternations and follows a steady increasing trend.
On the other hand
, the figures for Sweden fluctuate
dramatically
, until
finally
reaching that
A determiner is probably missing here: "of the USA".
of USA
at
nearly
2000.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Japan
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
starts
with a declining pattern, which
gradually
undergoes an incline at 1987 and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
a sharp rise in 2030, whereas its 65 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
population
goes beyond that of two other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
at the same period.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the proportion of the population aged 65 and over between 1940 and 2040 in three different countries.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
201 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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