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The graph below shows the population of Chile by age group between 1975 and 2035.

The graph below shows the population of Chile by age group between 1975 and 2035. mb1lr
The line graph illustrates the percentage of Chileans by four age groups from 1975 to 2035. Overall, it is clear that the proportion of Chilean in 15-64 years and over 65 years was increased during the whole survey. Additionally, the percentage of Chilean in 0-14 years was declined. In 1975, The percentage of Chilean in 15-64 years was the highest, at 52, followed by 38% of 0-14 years. 5% of Chileans over 65 years is the lowest in 1975. From 1975 to 2015, the percentage of Chileans was increased significantly and reaches the highest point at 70%. Meanwhile, the proportion of the oldest age group in Chile was rose slightly, at 11%. By contrast, the percentage of the youngest age group was decreased sharply and gradually, from 38% to 22%. From 2015 to 2035, the proportion in 15-64 years in Chile will be fell dramatically, at 61%. At the same time, the percentage of Chileans in 0-14 years will be dipped steadily and hit a low of 17%. By contrast, the proportion of Chileans over 65 years will be ascended slowly, from 11% to 14%.
The line graph illustrates the
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percentage
of Chileans by four age groups from 1975 to 2035.

Overall
, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of Chilean in 15-64 years and over 65 years
was increased
during the whole survey.
Additionally
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of Chilean in 0-14 years
was declined
.

In 1975, The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of Chilean in 15-64 years was the highest, at 52, followed by 38% of 0-14 years. 5% of Chileans over 65 years is the lowest in 1975. From 1975 to 2015, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of Chileans
was increased
significantly
and reaches the highest point at 70%. Meanwhile, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of the oldest age group in Chile was rose
slightly
, at 11%. By contrast, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of the youngest age group
was decreased
sharply
and
gradually
, from 38% to 22%.

From 2015 to 2035, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
in 15-64 years in Chile will be fell
dramatically
, at 61%. At the same time, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
percentage
of Chileans in 0-14 years will
be dipped
steadily
and hit a low of 17%. By contrast, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
proportion
of Chileans over 65 years will
be ascended
slowly
, from 11% to 14%.

IELTS academic The graph below shows the population of Chile by age group between 1975 and 2035.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
185 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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Lexical Resource: 6.0
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Grammatical Range: 6.5
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  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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