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The graph below shows the average number of Vietnamese students studying in England, Australia and Singapore between 2000 and 2005.

The graph below shows the average number of Vietnamese students studying in England, Australia and Singapore between 2000 and 2005. j5YGN
In 2001, there was an average of nearly $700 spent on national landline phones by US residents, in comparison with only around $200 each on mobile phones and international landline services. Over the next five years, the average amount poured into national fixed-line phones fell by approximately $200. By constrast, yearly spending on cell phones witnessed a significant increase of roughly $300. At the same time, the figure for overseas landline services fluctuated slightly below $300. In 2006, US consumers spent the same amount of money on mobile and national fixed-line services, with just over $500 on each. From the year 2006 onwards, it can be seen that the average yearly expenditure on mobile phones surpassed that on national fixed-line phones and mobile phones became the most common means of communication. To be specific, yearly spending on mobile phone services increased to nearly $750 in the last year, while the figure for national landline phone ones decreased to about $400 at the end of the period. During the same period, there was a stability in the figure for overseas phone calls
In 2001, there was an average of
nearly
$700 spent on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
landline
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
by US residents,
in comparison
with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
around $200 each on mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and international landline
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
. Over the
next
five years, the average amount poured into national

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
-line
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
fell by approximately $200. By
Possible spelling mistake found.
constrast
, yearly spending on

cell
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
witnessed a significant increase of roughly $300. At the same time, the figure for overseas landline
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
fluctuated
slightly
below $300.

In 2006, US consumers spent the same amount of money on mobile and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
-line
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
, with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over $500 on each. From the year 2006

onwards, it can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the average yearly expenditure on mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
surpassed that on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
-line
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
and mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phones
became the most common means of communication. To be specific, yearly spending on mobile
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
services
increased to
nearly
$750 in the last year, while the figure for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
landline
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
ones decreased to about $400 at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the period. During the same period, there was a stability in the figure for overseas
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
phone
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
calls
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the average number of Vietnamese students studying in England, Australia and Singapore between 2000 and 2005.

Academic
  American English
2 paragraphs
180 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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