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The graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car, bus or train between 1970 and 2030.

The graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car, bus or train between 1970 and 2030. pRJV9
The illustrated line graph below gives the information about the usual number of travellers who commute every day by car, bus or train in the UK between 1970 and 2030. Overall, according to the line graph below, using of private cars and public trains became the main source of travelling for every day while using buses remained stable and gradually decreased over the given period of time in the UK To begin with, in 1980, approximately 60 million commuters are using their private cars, as the source of their travelling from one point to another while it gradually increased and reached 70 million commuters in the year 2000, although it remains stable within 10 years but gradually plummeted and reached the plateau in 9 million of people in 2030. Moreover, usage of the bus by commuters remains unchanged until in the mid-2010 and 2020 wherein just over 3 millions of commuter are using it Furthermore, approximately 3million of commuters are using the train each day in the year 1970 up to 2000 meanwhile it remained stable within 10 years and it will climb in the near future in 5 million number of commuters.
The illustrated line graph below gives the information about the usual number of
Possible spelling mistake found.
travellers
who commute every day by car, bus or train in the UK between 1970 and 2030.

Overall
, according to the line graph below, using of private cars and public trains became the main source of travelling for every day while using buses remained stable and
gradually
decreased over the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period of time in the UK

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, in 1980, approximately 60
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million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commuters
are using their private cars, as the source of their travelling from one point to another while it
gradually
increased and reached 70
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million
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commuters
in the
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year
2000, although it remains stable within 10 years
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
gradually
plummeted and reached the plateau in 9
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million
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
in 2030.
Moreover
, usage of the bus by
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commuters
remains unchanged until in the mid-2010 and 2020 wherein
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
over 3
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millions
of
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commuter
are using it

Furthermore
, approximately
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3million
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commuters
are using the train each day in the
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year
1970 up to 2000 meanwhile it remained stable within 10 years and it will climb in the near future in 5
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
million
number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
commuters
.
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IELTS academic The graph below shows the average number of UK commuters travelling each day by car, bus or train between 1970 and 2030.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
193 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
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  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
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    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
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    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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