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the graph below show revenue earned from the tourist sector in US $ Billions. Summarize the information by selecting and reporting main features

the graph below show revenue earned from the tourist sector in US $ Billions. 9aYVr
The bar chart compares the information about income earned from the tourist sector. The data is evaluated in $ Billions. Overall, it is evident that, New zealand and singapore profit increased over the time, however an opposite trend can be seen in Malaysia. Australia had recorded highest revenue in 2015. Turning to the details, earnings of Australia thorugh tourist was 28 US $ Billions in the year 2010, being higher than that of Malaysia by 10 US $ Billions. There was mere increase of 1 US $ Billions in the Australia revenue from 2010 to 2015. Whereas, the income in Malaysia fell by 1 US $ Billions (from 18 to 17 US $ Billions). Analysing further, in next five year New Zealand experienced substanital gain in tourisum and increased to 9 US & Billions. there was a moderate increase in a
The bar chart compares the information about income earned from the tourist sector. The data
is evaluated
in $ Billions.

Overall
, it is evident that,
If the term is a proper noun, use initial capitals.
New zealand
and
Possible spelling mistake found.
singapore
profit increased over the time,
however
an opposite trend can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
in Malaysia. Australia had recorded
A determiner is probably missing here: "the highest".
highest
revenue in 2015.

Turning to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, earnings of Australia
Possible spelling mistake found.
thorugh
tourist was 28 US $
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Billions
in the year 2010, being higher than that of Malaysia by 10 US $
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Billions
. There was mere increase of 1 US $
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Billions
in the Australia revenue from 2010 to 2015.
“Whereas” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whereas
, the income in Malaysia fell by 1 US $
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Billions
(from 18 to 17 US $ Billions).

Possible spelling mistake. 'Analysing' is British English.
Analysing
further
, in
next
five year New Zealand experienced
Possible spelling mistake found.
substanital
gain in
Possible spelling mistake found.
tourisum
and increased to 9 US &
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Billions
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
there
was a moderate increase in
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
a
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IELTS academic the graph below show revenue earned from the tourist sector in US $ Billions.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
140 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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