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The given demonstrations provide data on changes of the city, named Langley between 1920 and 1950.

The given demonstrations provide data on changes of the city, named Langley between 1920 and 1950. m8M6q
The given demonstrations provide data on changes of the city, named Langley between 1920 and 1950. Overall, it can be clearly seen that the town modified and modernized, with new accommodations, markets, and park, varied considerably. To begin with, the constructions of western side of the town, there were small town houses at that places which was altered to the high-floor flats. Factories which were working in 1910, transformed to the Sharman Mansions. Laundry was replaced to the northern east of the city which had been owned with wasteland in 1910. There were considerable modifications in the south and east of the town. Primarily, instead of the railway workers’ cottages, newly established stores were constructed in the western part of the city. One of the major changes was in the middle and south of the city a modern Sherman Park that decorated with trees and lakes were built. Interestingly, café which situated in the south-west of the Sherman street adapted to the north of the that road.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
demonstrations provide data on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
of the city, named Langley between 1920 and 1950.

Overall
, it can be
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
modified and modernized, with new accommodations, markets, and park, varied
considerably
.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, the constructions of western side of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
, there were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
at that places which
was altered
to the high-floor flats. Factories which were working in 1910, transformed to the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Sharman
Mansions. Laundry
was replaced
to the northern east of the city which had been
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
with wasteland in 1910.

There were considerable modifications in the south and east of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
town
.
Primarily
,
instead
of the railway workers’ cottages,
newly
established stores
were constructed
in the western part of the city. One of the major
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
was in the middle and south of the city a modern Sherman Park that decorated with trees and lakes
were built
.
Interestingly
, café which situated in the south-west of the Sherman street adapted to the north of the that road.
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IELTS academic The given demonstrations provide data on changes of the city, named Langley between 1920 and 1950.

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
167 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
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  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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