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the changes price of different things

the changes price of different things 3Wlxb
The line graph shows the changes prices of different consumption products which was consumed fresh fruits and vegetables, sugar and sweets, and carbonated Drinking from 1979 to 2009. Overall, over the period given, the all kinds increased. Interestingly, three types overtook themselves to be the most commonly rose price and these fluctuated interestingly with the exception of carbonated drinking. As for the the changed price of Fruit and Vegetable grew the same with Sugar and Sweets from almost 50 in the frist year (1979), until these reached to 180 rate in 1991, however, the increasing was experienced a slight decrease and again they increased to 200 the same in 1995. Then the price of sugar and Sweets overtook Fruit and vegetables, intertingly, then Sugar and Sweets overtook and flactuated the former too. At the 310, they were the same and the kinds decrised to 300 in the final year. The price changes of consumer Pricing and Carbonated Drinking climbed the same slight increase until these noted 100. Moreover, the consumer pricing suddenly rose and decreased between 1991 and 1995. Despite the change, the former and latter grew the same amout until the final year and these showed 200.
The line graph
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shows
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
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prices
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
consumption products which
was consumed
fresh fruits and vegetables,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sugar
and sweets, and carbonated Drinking from 1979 to 2009.

Overall
, over the period
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
, the all kinds increased.
Interestingly
, three types overtook themselves to be the most
commonly
rose
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price
and these fluctuated
interestingly
Consider using "except" or "except for"
with the exception of
carbonated drinking.

As for
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "the" is left.
the the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of Fruit and Vegetable grew the same with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sugar
and Sweets from almost 50 in the
Possible spelling mistake found.
frist
year (1979), until these reached to 180 rate in 1991,
however
, the increasing
was experienced
a slight decrease and again they increased to 200 the
Possible agreement error. The noun 'same' seems to be countable, so consider using: "sames".
same
in 1995. Then the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of
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sugar
and Sweets overtook Fruit and vegetables,
Possible spelling mistake found.
intertingly
, then
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Sugar
and Sweets overtook and
Possible spelling mistake found.
flactuated
the former too. At the 310, they were the same and the kinds
Possible spelling mistake found.
decrised
to 300 in the final year.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
of consumer Pricing and Carbonated Drinking climbed the same slight increase until these noted 100.
Moreover
, the consumer pricing
suddenly
rose and decreased between 1991 and 1995. Despite the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
, the former and latter grew the same
Possible spelling mistake found.
amout
until the final year and these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
showed
200.
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IELTS academic the changes price of different things

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
198 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
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    Include an introduction and conclusion
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    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
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    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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