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The given chart demonstrates the figure of minutes of calls on telephone

The given chart demonstrates the figure of minutes of calls on telephone mLBdr
The given chart demonstrates the figure of minutes of calls on telephone of people living in the UK treated by three different methods over a 7-year-period starting from 1995. Looking at the graph, it is clear that the number of minutes of phone calls made via fixed lines witnessed an upward trend, while there was a slow reduction in that of mobile calls. It is also apparent that calls on mobile were the least popular type, in terms of overall usage during the period shown. In 1995, a total of user minutes via mobiles stood at approximately 4 billion minutes. This number experienced a sharp increase to nearly 45 billion at the end of the period. The surveyed period saw a roughly similar trend in that number of national and international calls, where it surged from just under 40 billion to a peak of more than 60 billion during the given period. Calls made via local – fixed lines registered a number of well over 70 billion minutes at the beginning of the period shown. This figure steadily jumped to 90 billion minutes before experiencing a gradual drop to its original number at the end of the time frame.
The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
chart demonstrates the figure of minutes of
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calls
on telephone of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
living in the UK treated by three
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
methods over a 7-year-period starting from 1995.

Looking at the graph, it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the
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number
of minutes of phone
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calls
made via
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
lines witnessed an upward trend, while there was a slow reduction in that of mobile
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calls
. It is
also
apparent that
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calls
on mobile were the least popular type, in terms of
overall
usage during the
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period
shown.

In 1995, a total of user minutes via mobiles stood at approximately 4
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billion
minutes. This
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number
experienced a sharp increase to
nearly
45
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billion
at the
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end
of the
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period
. The surveyed
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period
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saw
a roughly similar trend in that
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number
of national and international
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calls
, where it surged from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
under 40
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billion
to a peak of more than 60
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billion
during the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
period.

Calls made via local
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–
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
lines registered a
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number
of well over 70
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billion
minutes at the beginning of the
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period
shown. This figure
steadily
jumped to 90
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billion
minutes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
experiencing a gradual drop to its original
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
number
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
of the time frame.
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IELTS academic The given chart demonstrates the figure of minutes of calls on telephone

Academic
  American English
4 paragraphs
199 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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