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The following maps illustrates a public park in two different time 1920 and today respectivel. Designs present the changes in place of some facilities and enhanced parts.

The following maps illustrates a public park in two different time 1920 and today respectivel. Designs present the changes in place of some facilities and enhanced parts. YkOWV
The following maps illustrates a public park in two different time 1920 and today respectivel. Designs present the changes in place of some facilities and enhanced parts. The park started to use in 1920. Although there were multitude of entertainment sections, the park was redesigned and changed. Now, turning to details, deleting the stage for musicians, huge amphitheatre for concerts was constructed at the left side of the park Before The rose garden had been built, a fountain was located there. The seats were omitted and from bourders with reducing in number. they were moved to around the central rose garden. Even though in previous draft there were five seats, in new layout four seats were supposed. The pound for water plants was deleted and replaced with the childrens's play area. And as can be seen, glass house and top-right-corner-located rose garden were substituted by the water feature and the café respectively. Without changing in entrances' location, an underground car park entrance was added to park
The following maps
You should probably use "illustrate".
illustrates
a public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
in two
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
time 1920 and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
Possible spelling mistake found.
respectivel
. Designs present the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in place of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
facilities and enhanced parts.

The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
in 1920. Although there were multitude of entertainment sections, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
was redesigned
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Now
, turning to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
details
, deleting the stage for musicians, huge
Possible spelling mistake. 'amphitheatre' is British English.
amphitheatre
for concerts
was constructed
at the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
side of the park

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Before
The rose garden had
been built
, a fountain
was located
there. The seats
were omitted
and from
Possible spelling mistake found.
bourders
with reducing in number.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
they
were
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
moved
to around the central rose garden.
Even though
in previous draft there were five seats, in new layout four seats
were supposed
. The pound for water plants
was deleted
and replaced with the
Possible spelling mistake found.
childrens
's play area. And as can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
, glass
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
and top-right-corner-located rose garden
were substituted
by the water feature and the café
respectively
. Without changing in entrances' location, an underground car
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
park
entrance was
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
added
to
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
park
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IELTS academic The following maps illustrates a public park in two different time 1920 and today respectivel. Designs present the changes in place of some facilities and enhanced parts.

Academic
  American English
3 paragraphs
165 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • ?
    Include an introduction and conclusion
  • ?
    Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • ?
    Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • ?
    Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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